


Iron & Ivory

by transteverogers



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Abuse mentioned, Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Shadowhunters, Enemies to Lovers, Hate to Love, M/M, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Torture, Shadowhunter AU, Smut, death mention, seriously theres a lot of dead people in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-19
Updated: 2015-02-19
Packaged: 2018-03-13 20:27:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3395315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transteverogers/pseuds/transteverogers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam <i>knows</i> he's a shitty shadowhunter but he doesn't need Zayn Malik- the son of the reasons his parents are dead- of all people teaching him to fight. </p><p>(AKA the one where they don't hate each other and then do and then they sort of don't and they <i>really</i> do and then they really don't and then one hates the other until they actually fucking talk for once)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Iron & Ivory

**Author's Note:**

> I WOULD LIKE TO START THIS OFF BY SAYING I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST ZAYNS PARENTS I JUST NEEDED THEM TO BE EVIL IM SORRY and yeah so this is for the big bang fic thingy and id like to thank my artist for the fab art that can be seen [here](http://caputell.tumblr.com/post/111460955358/cover-art-for-the-ziam-mortal-instruments-au-iron)

“Mr. Payne, we regret to inform you but your parents have died on the battle field against the Maliks.”

 

Funny, how one little sentence can shatter your world to nothing more than a few dull shades of grey and a whole lot of pain.

 

“Since you have no immediate family living in the area, we will be sending you to the London institute to follow your studies in becoming a shadowhunter.”

 

The whole scene just replays over and over again in Liam’s head, a never ending loop of misery and heartache and _death._

Liam looks up at the large institute in front of him (nothing more than ruins to the mundanes passing by), sighing softly to himself before picking his bag up off the ground again, and heading up the looming building in front of him, fingering the chain around his neck with his parent’s wedding bands. He’d been doing that a lot since the council had given him the rings, claiming those were among the very few things they could salvage from their bodies, most of their other things had been destroyed in- in whatever happened to them. Liam hadn’t paid attention to the details and, honestly, he really didn’t need to know what happened. All he needed to know was that the Malik’s were responsible for this and when he was of age, Liam was going to join the other shadowhunters in the front lines and get his revenge for his parents’ deaths.

 

He stops right in front of the door, unsure he was just supposed to go into the building or if he was supposed to knock. He decides to knock, but after getting no answer for a couple of moments, he just walks in the building slowly, closing the heavy door as softly as he can behind him.

 

“Uh, hello?” Liam calls out. “Anyone here?”

 

There’s no answer for a couple moments before- “FUCKING HELL HAROLD I _TOLD_ YOU TO GO ANSWER THE FUCKING DOOR!” Someone yells and a boy comes around the corner, dressed in nothing more than a pair of sweats hanging low on his hips. “Who the fuck are you?” He asks, raising an eyebrow. He’s got soft brown hair and sparkling blue eyes with a body covered in runes.

 

“I’m uh,” Liam says, not looking directly at the boy. “I’m Liam Payne.”

 

“Oh, you’re the orphan.” He says in a bored tone as he looks Liam over.

 

The way he says the word- _orphan_ \- makes Liam’s blood boil over. “I’m more than an orphan.” He bites out, seeing red.

 

The boy rolls his eyes. “Please, we’re all nothing more than orphans when we come here. Orphans and abandoned children.” He pauses, giving Liam a bitter smile. “At least you’ve got money when you’re of age.” He snorts. “That’s all you Paynes are really known for. It’s no wonder your parents went and got themselves killed-” He can’t say anything else because Liam’s attacked him, vision gone red and he’s got the boy pinned to the wall, his arm pressed up against his throat.

 

“Don’t say anything about my parents.” His hisses lowly, putting just a bit of pressure on Louis’s neck. “ _Ever.”_

“Already pissed off the new guy have you Lou?” A third voice says from behind Liam. This one has an Irish accent and when Liam looks behind him, he sees another guy with bright blue eyes but this one has dyed blond hair. “M’Niall Horan and that asshole is Louis Tomlinson. Don’t let him get to you, he’s an asshole to everyone but Harry.”

 

Louis snorts. “I don’t remember you calling me an asshole last night when I snuck you out of here.”

 

“I’ll have to remember the insults for next time.” Niall grins at him before shifting his glaze to Liam who still has Louis against a wall. “Wanna let him go?”

 

Liam looks back at Louis who has the bravery (or stupidity) to grin cheekily at him before he glares at him but ultimately backs away and lets Louis go. “Thanks for that one mate.” He says with a dry tone and Liam levels him with a look, not in the mood for this jackass’s games.

 

“Don’t call me mate.” He says, crossing his arms and making his muscles look bigger.

 

“Alright then, _pal._ ” Louis replies with a sarcastic grin.

 

Niall rolls his eyes, gaining Liam’s attention. “Ignore him. C’mon mate, I’ll show you around the institute.”

 

Liam grabs his bags again, following Niall as he walks down the hall, not really paying attention as he talks, and just letting the sounds wash over him as he looks around at everything. The other boy, Louis, leaves them almost right away, ducking into one of the rooms and closing the door firmly behind him as he does so. Liam thinks he hears the other boy snickering, but it might have been his mind playing tricks on him.

 

It’d been a long week.

 

“… So the institute is a safe house,” Niall says, having no clue that Liam’s barely been paying attention. He does his best to tune into the blonde boy, feeling just a little rude. His parents raised him to be a gentleman.

 

 _They’re not around to see that anymore._ He thinks to himself bitterly, and lets out a tiny huff, getting a look from Niall but he continues on, otherwise obvious.

 

“Basically we get a lot of Shadowhunters in and out- you’d be surprised at how many- but there’s only 4 of us who live here. 7 if we’re counting you and the two adults who run it. And then there’s a bunch of the staff.” Niall snorts. “There’s me, Louis, Harry Styles-” The last name Styles rings a bell of remembrance in Liam’s mind, bringing up a memory from a couple years ago. He’s pretty sure the Styles are the ones who captured the Malik’s only son- who, according to rumours (though Liam doesn’t believe them), was being held in captive and had nearly died.

 

Liam always believed in the like father like son saying that went around.

 

“-And then of course, Zayn.” Niall finishes off, coming up to a room and pausing. “Uh, there’s something you should know about Zayn.”

 

Liam raises an eyebrow as the two boys walk into a beautiful library. He looks around with widen eyes, never having scene that many books in his life. When you walked in, you were on a higher level, the walls a couple stories high (he guesses) and covered in books. The lower level was smaller, just a small rectangular shape with a couple tables and a fireplace with some chairs surrounding it. “Holy shit.” He says, dropping his bag in surprise.

 

“Book worm?” Niall asks, surprised.

 

Liam shrugs. “Not a huge one but holy crap I don’t think I’ve ever seen this many books.”

 

“Try the mundane library down the street.” A new voice says, rather dully. “You’d be surprised how tiny this place is.”

 

Liam looks over to the fire, seeing that the owner of the voice has gotten up and is walking over to them. He’s tall, just a little shorter than Liam himself, but that’s where all the similarities end. While Liam is pale, buff and puppy looking, this boy has sharp cheekbones with stubble dusted across them, and his skin is a soft brown covered in the white marks of runes- some of which Liam doesn’t recognise. He’s thin too, with lean muscles covering his bare arms. “I’m Liam.” He introduces himself to the boy, smiling at him just slightly.

 

The boy raises an eyebrow. “Niall hasn’t told you yet?” He laughs, rolling his eyes before giving Liam a blank smile, eyes harden and cold. “I’m Zayn. Zayn Malik.”

 

Liam’s mood changes instantly, seeing nothing but red and he goes to tackle Zayn and- and Liam isn’t quite sure, but Niall holds him back as he struggles. “LET ME GO!” He roars, trying to shake Niall off of him. “HE’S THE REASON MY PARENTS ARE DEAD.” Liam can feel tears running down his face but he can’t control anything, the need and rage over the Maliks consuming him as he struggles against Niall. He thinks he hears Niall call for someone to help hold Liam back as Zayn stands there, looking blankly at Liam. “LET ME KILL HIM, HE-”

 

“Did nothing boy, _calm down!”_ A new, older voice commands, helping hold Liam back.

 

“He’s- He’s a _Malik!”_ Liam spits the name out like it’s nothing better than the ground that he walks on- and it’s true. “He’s the reason for this war-”

 

“He is not his parents.” The voice says firmly, causing Liam to look up at him. He’s an older man, with brown-grey hair and wrinkles around his eyes that Liam’s sure isn’t from smiling. “The Malik boy is under the protection of this institute and you will not harm him.”

 

Liam looks between the older man and Zayn, gapping. “He’s a monster! The Malik’s killed my parents!”

 

“Niall,” The voice says, ignoring Liam. “Take Zayn back to his room please.”

 

Niall nods, letting go of Liam (the man has a stronger grip on him anyways) and goes over to Zayn. He goes to touch Zayn but the boy lifts up a hand to stop him. He walks closer to Liam, the entire room tense. “Rather your parents be dead and heroes than alive and monstrous.” He says in a low voice, lifting up his shift to reveal a large scar, stretching up from his hip bone and going across his stomach diagonally and disappearing up higher. Zayn shakes his head softly, muttering something in a language Liam doesn’t understand before turning around and leaving, Niall trailing uncertainly behind him.

 

“Why is he here?” Liam finally says in a low tone.

 

“He’s a shadowhunter in need, just like you.”

 

Liam laughs bitterly. “He’s _nothing_ like me. His parents are alive and they’re monsters.”

 

“And just because his family is evil, does it make him?”

 

“Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.” Liam says bitterly, shaking the older man off of him. He knows he has the opportunity to run after Zayn, try and find him and kill him but he thinks better of it. For now.

 

“You Paynes are not known for you fighting skills.” He muses softly, raising an eyebrow at Liam as if daring him to say something. Liam doubts this man will be as easy to hold down as Louis was. “Yet your father beat that reputation. The apple can fall far.”

 

“Not with a bad seed.” Liam mutters, going back to where his bag is sitting. “I’d like to be shown to my room now.” He says firmly.

 

“I’ll have Harry come and escort you.” He says, looking Liam over. “You’ll formally meet everyone at breakfast tomorrow but my name is Simon Cowell and I run the institute. I do not tolerate violence here against other shadowhunters, unless you’re sparring. Do you understand Liam?”

 

“Yes sir.” Liam mutters.

 

“Speak up boy.” He commands.

 

Liam bites his tongue at first, making sure he doesn’t say anything rude. “Yes sir.” He repeats after a moment, louder like Mr. Cowell wanted.

 

“I don’t care who it is, but you’ll treat them like your equal.”

 

“Yes sir.” Liam says again.

 

“Dinner’s in a few hours, I don’t expect you to join us tonight since I imagine you had a long journey but I do expect you to join tomorrow at breakfast. It’s at 9am sharp, do _not_ be late. Harry here,” He motions to a boy Liam hadn’t noticed had come in, “Will show you to your room and explain a few more of the rules.”

 

Harry smiles at him. “Would you like me to take your bag?” He asks, already going for the bag that’s beside Liam.

 

“No.” Liam says, picking it up. “I’m fine. Just show me to my room.” He pauses. “Please.”

 

Harry smiles at him again, leading Liam out of the library and to what Liam hopes will is his room. “There’s only a few rules here, honestly.” He says as he walks. “Simon basically lets us run the place as long as we go to our lessons and don’t get into fights with each other.” He shrugs, taking a couple turns. Liam already knows he’s going to get lost later one. “Don’t worry about getting lost.” Liam’s eyebrows shoot up. “You were thinking aloud.” Harry laughs not unkindly.

 

“Oh.” Liam says, biting his lip as they come to stop at a door.

 

“So this is your room.” Harry says, gesturing to it. “I can give you the proper tour of this place tomorrow or later tonight, or whenever you want really. There’s not much here other than the library, the gardens and the weapon room.” He laughs.

 

“Right.” Liam says, pushing open the door and going into his room. It was simple, not big and not small. It had a four poster bed pressed again one wall but still in the middle-ish of the room. There was a desk and a dresser with dark wood, matching the dark colours of the bed. There was a large bay window on one wall, taking up most of it but it was currently covered with curtains, blocking out most light.

 

“The door over there is a bathroom,” Harry says, pointing at one door. “And that one is your closet.” He points to another one. “If you need something just shout out into the hall. We all have bedrooms in this hall and the servants have creepy good hearing.” He laughs again, smiling at Liam. “Any questions?”

 

“Am I allowed to leave?” He asks. “Like, if I wanted to go out into the mundane world for a bit, would I be able to?”

 

Harry frowns. “Why would you want to?”

 

Liam hates how Zayn’s first worlds to him about the mundane library pop into his head but they do, no matter what his feelings are. “I’m just curious to whether or not I’m a prisoner here or not.”

 

“Well, you’re free to go anywhere in here.” Harry replies, carefully avoiding the question but Liam catches on.

 

“So I’m not allowed to leave.” He states, annoyed.

 

Harry sighs. “It’s for your own protection. We don’t know how well you can fight and unlike in Idris, there’s demons at every corner in this city. We just need to know that you’ll be able to hold up on your own.”

 

Liam’s eyes narrow. “I’m not a baby.”

 

“I didn’t say you were.” Harry says carefully. “I’m just saying we need to know that you can protect yourself.”

 

“Why?” He demands, suddenly getting angry. “Because I’m a Payne? Because we’re known to not be able to fight?”

 

“It has nothing to do with that.” Harry replies calmly. Liam hates how he’s able to stay so calm.

 

Liam snorts, turning his back to Harry and beginning to unpack his stuff. “Sure it isn’t.” He says in a bitter tone. “Just ignore the fact that my father was one of the best shadowhunters the council had seen in years.”

 

“Yes, I will ignore that.” Harry says in a tone Liam has yet to hear him us. “Liam, here we don’t judge by family and it’s about time you’re introduced to that concept. We’re not going to hold you to your family and we expect you to the same for the rest of us.” He pauses. “Even Zayn.”

 

“Oh so we’re just ignoring the fact that he’s probably a spy. Oh, yeah, let’s forget that he’s _murdered_ -”

 

“Enough.” Harry says in a strong tone, levelling a look at Liam. Liam’s surprised enough that he actually does stop talking. He has a gut feeling that Harry doesn’t use that tone very often. “If Zayn does something bad, than that’s on him. We’re not holding his family against him. End of discussion.” He turns to leave but pauses at the door. He takes a breath before looking back at Liam. “I suggest you give everyone here a chance. Things will be a lot harder if you fight friends at every turn. You’re going to have too many demons to fight to fight us too.”

 

Liam turns back around to his stuff before Harry closes the door, only managing to put a couple more things away before stumbling across the few photos he brought. There were three of them. One was him and his parents just after he had been born, another of his parent’s wedding photo and the last was the only photo he had of his entire family. It was taken a couple years back and Liam can’t help but smile sadly at the photo. His two older sisters, Ruth and Nicola, had left home as soon as they were of age to fight in the battle. Ruth had died two days after she left in a freak accident (the council called it a freak accident, Liam didn’t know what to think) and Nicola was off somewhere in Japan, doing some undercover opp. She probably didn’t even know their parents had died.

 

He puts the one of his parents at their wedding beside his bed before putting the other two on the dresser. He’d have to send a letter back to Idris asking if they’d be willing to send some more of his stuff. He wasn’t sure how long he was going to last on the clothing he packed. Liam forces himself to finish unpacking the stuff he has, tossing his most personal things (a journal of his fathers, Ruth’s first and last letter to the family, a new-ish photo of Nicola with her team) in the drawer of the bedside table before quickly stripping to his boxers, taking the chain with his parent’s wedding bands off and placing it on the dress and then jumping into the bed.

 

The bed was as soft as his one back home, the blankets cool to his touch but he knew they would warm up soon enough. The pillows were soft too, a little too soft for Liam’s personal preference but he doesn’t both going out into the hall and asking if he can have new ones. He knows it’s early (only 4:47 in the afternoon if he was going off of his watch) but he’s tired for a long day of travels and emotional whiplash that all seems to hit him at once. He’s asleep within minutes.

 

_______________________________________

 

When Liam wakes up the next morning it’s only 3:37 in the morning. He groans softly, already knowing he won’t be able to fall back asleep. He always was a light sleeper and when he was awake, he was awake for good. He pushes his covers back, feeling a small chill so he decides to throw on some sweats and a hoodie before softly padding out into the hall. The halls are silent as Liam walks around the building as quiet as a moose, the only sound being his breathing and the occasional creak from the floor boards.

 

He manages to stumble across the kitchen and grabs an apple from the fruit bowl, biting into it loudly.

 

“Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping?” Someone says from behind him.

 

Liam looks around, and is faced with Zayn who’s now going through the fridge. He bites down on the rage that bubbles in him, doing his best to remember Harry’s words. “Aren’t you?” He forces out coldly, not taking his eyes off of Zayn. He doesn’t trust him and he makes that rather obvious.

 

Zayn shrugs, taking a carton of milk out and drinking straight from it. Liam makes a face, unable to help it, and Zayn just grins at him before wiping his mouth and putting it back. He goes to one of the cupboards and searches around for a couple moments before pulling out a jar of _Nutella._ “I don’t sleep.” He says with a shrug as he grabs a spoon and takes a spoonful of the food. “Want some?” He offers it to Liam. Liam can’t help but raise an eyebrow at him and Zayn shrugs, bringing the container closer to himself. “Suit yourself.” He mutters. They’re silent for a couple moments, no sounds other than them eating before Zayn talks. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

 

“For?” Liam asks tensely.

 

Zayn shrugs again, not looking at Liam. “You know what for.” He pauses. “And don’t expect any more apologies. I’m not my parents.”

 

“I don’t trust you.” Liam says bluntly.

 

“You’d be stupid to.” Zayn says, giving him a mocking grin. “Should’ve seen where they used to be keeping me. Did you know they have cages under the institute? I would suggest checking them out but there’s nothing to them.” His laugh is emotionless. “No one trusts a Malik.”

 

“Your parents-” Liam starts to say but Zayn cuts him off with an eye roll.

 

“Are horrible people but aren’t everyone’s?” Zayn says.

 

Liam frowns. “Most people’s parents don’t start wars.”

 

Zayn shrugs. “So they were a little ambitious.”

 

“You act like this is all a joke to you, like there aren’t people _dying_ out there-” Liam says, starting to get really angry.

 

Zayn glares at him. “You think I don’t know that?” He says in a dangerously low tone. “You think the council doesn’t keep me up to date on my parent’s body toll? You think I don’t go to bed every single night worrying over my sisters who are still at the mercy of my _parents?”_ He spits the last word out like it’s a disease and with his parents, Liam doesn’t think that comparison is too far off. “If I don’t turn it into a joke that means I have to let it get to me, let the weight of the countless murders they’ve committed and-” He makes an annoyed noise, roughly dropping the spoon into the sink and putting the _Nutella_ back where he found it. “This is none of your business.”

 

“Seeing as it’s your parents fault both of my parents and one of my sisters died, I’d say yeah, it is just a little bit of my business.” Liam says defiantly, crossing his arms.

 

Zayn laughs cruelly. “Stop trying to play hero boy.” He looks Liam up and down, shaking his head. “I’d bet you’ve never even held a weapon before.”

 

“Why’d you say that?” Liam says hotly, trying to cover up the fact that that’s mostly true. He had held a weapon before, taken countless classes but he’s _hopeless_ when it comes to fighting. Most of his teachers had called him a worthless shadowhunter (albeit not to his face, but he heard things. Idris wasn’t exactly quiet when it came to their gossip).

 

“I knew how to wield three different types of weapons before I could speak English.” Zayn says. “As of now, I can wield just about any weapon given to me.”

 

“And that makes you such a good fighter?” Liam questions.

 

Zayn snorts. “The fact that you had to ask that question just further proves my point.” He turns around to leave, but not before calling back to Liam. “Have fun with your lessons, Payne.”

 

Liam doesn’t bother going after him, just sighs and rubs at his face for a moment before tossing his apple core into the garbage before heading back to his room. He could at least finishing unpacking with this spare time.

 

He finishes unpacking around 4:30 and decides to go exploring again, hopefully without running into Zayn this time around. He walks around aimlessly, really, just popping his head in random doors, looking around without disturbing anything. He wasn’t sure if he was technically _allowed_ to do this, but no one had told him he wasn’t so he could really just claim ignorance if he got caught.

 

Which Liam wasn’t planning on doing, honestly.

 

He finds a couple different interesting rooms, like the _huge_ bathroom on one of the higher floors (that he was sure he’d have to sneak into later and test everything out) and the game room on the ground floor. Liam stays in that room longest, looking around at all of the gaming consuls just a little confused. He’d heard about mundane things like this but they didn’t have them in Idris. He was intrigued, admittedly.

 

Liam still doesn’t touch anything, worried he might accidentally break something. He leaves about twenty minutes later when his curiosities had its fill, vowing to come back with Harry or Niall and ask one of them to show him how to work the machines.

 

He finds a work out room and a sparring room, the sparring room being one of the biggest rooms he’s yet to find. It was open, the ceiling probably three stories up and the entire floor was padded, soft under Liam’s feet. There were some punching bags hanging around the sides of the room but the thing that interested Liam the most was the advanced climbing mechanism that took up the entirety of the room from the second story up. He laughs softly, going over to where the rope was hanging down, grabbing it and easily pulling himself up to the thin beam higher up.

 

He balances easily, like always, and decides to just explore the climbing thing. He notices a rock climbing wall over on the far side that goes all the way to the roof, but decides that that’s the easy way up and decides to take a longer way, doing his best to pull himself through the different climbing obstacles. It takes him awhile, finding the perfect way up, but soon enough he’s perched up in the top corner where a small canopy is, lying there and looking down.

 

Liam laughs softly, looking at how far he came. Heights never scared him, the fear of falling never affecting him. Back in Idris, he’d always do his best to find the tallest tree and see how high he could get on it. It had given his mother and father a number of heart attacks. His own heart tugs at the memory of his parents and he blinks away a few tears.

 

“Nah, Haz he’s not in here.” A familiar Irish voice says as the two boys walk into the training room. “He couldn’t have gotten that far.”

 

“He was asking about leaving last night…” Harry mules the thought over.

 

“You think he left?” Niall asks and Liam figures out quickly enough they’re talking about him. He stays quiet, listening to the boys talk.

 

Harry lets out a sigh. “Dunno, it’s too soon to figure out if he’s the escaping type of person. All of his stuff’s still here so we know he’s coming back.”

 

“I’ll go tell a couple of the servants to watch the main door and his bedroom.” Niall says, leaving Harry alone in the room.

 

Liam decides now is a good time to pop his head over the edge of the canopy and look down on the two boys. “Won’t be necessary.” He calls down, grinning as Harry and Niall both look up with comically wide eyes. “Nice climbing mechanism you got here.” He says in a lazy tone. “Kinda easy once you get the hang of it though.”

 

“Liam you’re not supposed to be up there without anyone spotting you!” Harry calls up. “Just… Come down slowly yeah?”

 

Liam rolls his eyes but does as Harry says. Well, not _exactly_ as Harry says. He does get down but it’s not slow. Once he gets to one of the bottom beams, he jumps, landing perfectly in front of Harry with a grin. “Not bad, huh?” He boasts.

 

“Don’t.” Harry says sternly, sounding oddly like Liam’s mother did whenever he did that trick in front of her. “You’re not even supposed to be in here without someone, much less _climbing_ without a spotter.” He takes a deep breath as Liam bites on his bottom lip, feeling just a little guilty. “Next time you want do something that stupid, at least take someone with you.”

 

“You’re not my keeper.” Liam finally mutters, having enough.

 

Harry raises an eyebrow, crossing his arms. “Yeah but see, in a few years, this institute will be mine so I’d rather not have had someone die from stupidity in here.”

 

Liam huffs, crossing his own arms. “You’re still not my mother.” He mutters, brushing past Harry and Niall, leaving the training room and heading back to his own room but not before Niall can call after him. He doesn’t wait for Niall to catch up, just keeps walking, but the blonde boys manages to catch up anyhow.

 

“He’s just looking out for you.” Niall explains as the two walk back to Liam’s room. “Simon would have your head if he found out that you were on there alone.” He pauses. “Although, most people can’t even get that high. Nice work.”

 

A small smile tugs across Liam’s lips against his will. “Yeah, well he doesn’t seem to think so.”

 

Niall rolls his eyes. “Please, Harry was impressed, as terrified as he was.” He shrugs. “Just take someone with you next time, yeah?”

 

Liam sighs. “Fine.” He agrees.

 

Niall grins at him. “Awesome. Breakfast should be ready in like, an hour so I’ll come by and walk with you there.”

 

“Not hungry.” Liam says, going into his room and closing the door behind him.

 

“Simon doesn’t care if you’re hungry or not!” Niall calls through the door. “Be ready in forty minutes!”

 

_______________________________________

 

True to his word, Niall comes back forty minutes later, banging on Liam’s door. “I’m coming in!” He yells after a moment of Liam not replying. He pokes his head into the bedroom, first with his eyes covered as if scared of seeing Liam naked. “Hope you’re decent.” He uncovers his eyes, seeing Liam just lying on his bed. “Dude, breakfast is in, like, fifteen minutes.” Liam just hums, not really caring. Niall sighs, sitting on the edge of the bed. “It’s shit.”

 

“What is?” Liam asks, kind of confused. He plays with the necklace around his neck, rubbing the two rings in between his fingers.

 

“Losing someone.” Niall says in a small voice. “I didn’t know my parents, dad died before I was born and mum died during child birth. My brother and I were put into this institute right after. This is the only home I’ve ever known.” He admits. “I don’t really feel anything towards my parents- didn’t know them- but my brother died a few years back.” Liam looks over at Niall who’s blinking back a couple tears and Niall just shrugs at him. “It’s the world we live in, we have to be realistic that when someone leaves, they might not come back.” He wipes at his eyes for a moment before continuing. “But, yeah, it sucks loosing people. It takes a while to be able to say their name and think about them without that rage or sadness but it happens.” He pauses for a moment, thinking. “We’ve all got our own stories here.”

 

“What’s Harry and Louis’s?” Liam can’t help but ask, a spark of curiosity filling him.

 

Niall shakes his head. “Not mine to tell. If you ask Harry, he’ll tell you but Louis… The only person here who knows Louis’s full story is Harry. I know bits and pieces but not much.”

 

Liam nods and lets out a breath. “Give me five minutes to get dressed.” He says after a moment, rolling off the bed.

 

Niall grins at him, leaving him alone in the room. Liam tugs off his sweats and puts a pair of jeans on and some socks, his feet feeling a bit cold. He decides to just leave the hoodie on, not caring that much as he stuffs the necklace back under it. He quickly puts on some deodorant before exiting the room.

 

The two boys walk to where they have their meals together (breakfast and dinner, lunch was fend for yourself) and Niall talked Liam’s ear off about everything they had in the institute, reminding Liam about the mundane things he had found in the game room that he wanted to ask about. “What about those uh… video games I think they’re called.” Liam asks as they near the dining hall.

 

Niall grins at him. “I’ll show you them later tonight mate.” He says with a laugh, pushing open the door and plopping into the empty seat beside Louis and going to steal a piece of the other boy’s toast. Before Niall’s hand can even get close to the plate, Louis slaps it away, moving his plate farther away from Niall. “Get your own food.” He mumbles sleepily, taking a sip from a mug of tea.

 

Liam sits gingerly across the table and beside Harry. There’s a plate already in front of him and he starts filling it up with the food that’s sitting in front of him. The food consists of everything from sugary cereal to homemade pancakes. Liam goes straight for the blueberry pancakes, grabbing a few of them before grabbing a piece of toast as well. He hadn’t realised how hungry he was until Liam had smelt the cooked food. He takes a bite of his pancake, noticing all of the others are staring at him. He chews slowly before swallowing. “What?”

 

“They’re staring at you because you’re sitting in my spot.” That oh so familiar voice says, bored yet tired. Liam rolls his eyes, taking another bite of his food before replying to Zayn.

 

“There’s a bunch of other seats.” Liam points out. “Anyways, it’s not like this has your name on it or anything.”

 

Zayn lets out a sigh, sitting next to Liam with a toxic smile. “Well, I think I’ll sit right here then.” He says in a sickly sweet voice, obviously forced and made to annoy Liam. He just rolls his eyes as the three other boys watch the exchange.

 

“Fine.” Liam says bitterly and it’s obvious to everyone in the room that it’s really not fine, rather quite the opposite between them.

 

“Lovely even.” Zayn replies, still talking in that overly sweet voice as Simon walks into the room. He feels the tense air as soon as he enters the room, looking over at Liam and Zayn with a raised eyebrow. After a moment though, he just shakes his head ever so slightly and goes to sit at his spot at the head of the table.

 

“Morning boys.” He says in a dry voice, barely taking his eyes off of Liam and Zayn. A collective reply comes from 4 of the boys, all sounding different. There’s a couple tired ones, an annoyed one and an overly happy one. Zayn doesn’t say anything. Simon pauses for a moment before talking again. “So, Liam, Harry tells me you’re a climber.”

 

Liam’s cheeks tint slightly pink as he shrugs. He takes another bite of his food, chewing on it slowly before replying. “I can climb, yeah.”

 

“Well, I’m sure Harry’s told you already not to use the climbing exercise again without someone spotting you.” Simon says, putting some food onto his own plate as the others eat. “We’ll let it go this time because you didn’t know.”

 

“Thank you sir.” Liam says in a soft voice, glancing up only for a moment to look at Simon who’s already switching topics.

 

“Now, as for your lessons.” Simon continues on. “Your tutors tell me that academically, you’ve exceeded other students for your age.” Liam nods, confirming this with a stronger blush. “But your fighting instructors say rather the opposite, is that correct?” He trails off and Liam’s face burns with humiliation.

 

“What’d you know.” Zayn mutters from beside him. “I was right.”

 

“Shut up.” Liam hisses, his face still bright red as he turns back to Simon. “Yes sir.” He forces out behind clenched teeth.

 

“Well here, we’re more for practical studies rather than theoretical, perhaps all you need is some practice.” He says in a firm tone. “Zayn?”

 

“Yes?” Zayn says slowly, not looking up as he picks at his food. Liam wants to hit him over the head at how disrespectful he’s being. He wants to hit him over the head for a lot of other reasons too.

 

“You’re going to teach Liam how to fight.”

 

Liam’s heart stops. “Sir- you _can’t!_ ” He automatically protests. There was no _way_ he was going to let Zayn teach him how to fight, no way at all.

 

“I can’t?” Simon asks with a raised eyebrow.

 

“S-Sir,” Liam stutters nervously. “I just mean- he- he’s a Malik!”

 

Zayn whips his head up finally, glaring viciously at Liam. “Don’t use my name against me Payne.” He hisses lowly, table knife clenched in his hand so tightly that his knuckles turn white.

 

Liam turns to look at him, eyes equally venous. “I refuse to be taught by a murderer.”

 

Zayn laughs cruelly, eyes still watching Liam dangerous. “And I refuse to teach this naive little boy.” He says in a dangerous tone. “Never had to even fight for your life, have you?”

 

“Well I certainly don’t enjoy killing innocent-” Liam begins to spit out but Simon interrupts him.

 

“ _Enough!_ ” He yells, commanding the attention of everyone in the room, boys and servants alike. “I don’t care if you’re refusing, Zayn you will teach Liam how to fight and _neither_ of you will seriously injure the other, understood?” It’s silent. “ _Understood?_ ” He presses again.

 

“Yes sir.” Both boys mutter before glancing at the other, glaring as they do so.

 

This wasn’t going to be easy on either of them, especially not with Simon’s next words on top of the training sessions. “Liam, you’re also going to be tutoring Zayn as well.”

 

“My studies are fine.” Zayn mutters under his breath, stabbing his food viciously with his fork.

 

“Sir…” Liam begins to say but Simon levels him with another look so Liam just shuts his mouth, turning back to his food as a tense conversation starts up around him, the three other boys scared to say one wrong word. The idle chatter continues for a few moments before a thought occurs to Liam. “Sir?” He asks and Simon looks his way. “I was just wondering if word of my parents… passing-” He still couldn’t find the strength to say death- “Had reached my sister.”

 

“I haven’t heard from Idris.” Simon says, “But they had sent word to her. It’ll take a while to reach her.” Liam nods, knowing this. He finishes off the last couple of bites of his food before putting his knife and fork down and beginning to get up. “Your first lesson is in an hour.” Simon says, already having turned back to his food. “Meet Zayn in the training room.”

 

Liam just bites his tongue, deciding it best not to say anything as he leaves. He heads back to his room slowly, taking in everything as he walks. He already knows he’s going to eventually get lost in this building, it was huge and confusing. He manages to make it back to his bedroom though, only having to stop a servant once to ask for directions (which was rather embarrassing to say the least). As soon as he gets to his room, he falls face first into his bed, letting out a muffled scream/yell of annoyance. He couldn’t _believe_ Simon was making him training with- with a murderer! Not to mention he was also supposed to tutor him!? He groans in anger into the pillow again, rage filling him.

 

He flips his head to the side to breath, looking at the photo of his parents on his bedside table. “I wish you were here.” He says in a small voice. He knew shadowhunters were born to deal with lose but… Liam feels his heart getting heavier in his chest and tears well up in his eyes, already spilling over as he looks at his parent’s smiling faces. Liam remembers asking his father when he was a lot younger about what it was to be a shadowhunter. Even at that young age, he knew he couldn’t fight very well and he was scared about it. His father told him that a shadowhunter’s abilities didn’t lie in whether or not they could fight, but if they were _willing_ to. Liam gives the photo a watery smile and reaches out to touch it softly.

 

“I’m sorry dad.” He says softly, laughing just slightly. “I know if you were here, you and mum would be hitting me over the head for being rude. I just…” He takes a deep breath. “Every time I look at him, I see you two, dead. Bodies lying somewhere in the battle field.” Liam pauses for a moment. “I’m going to kill whoever wrongfully murdered you.” He swears, nodding at the photo. “I…” He trails off, sitting up and crossing his legs as he looks at the photo of them and plays with the rings around his neck. “I’m just sorry I couldn’t be stronger.” He whispers to the photo, a few more tears falling down his face and hitting the covers.

 

_______________________________________

 

An hour later Liam’s dressed in the ridiculously tight sparring clothes his father had gotten him last year as a gift. They’d been worn a total of 3 times before.

 

“You’re late.” Zayn states as soon as he walks into the training room.

 

“Got lost.” Liam replies in a flat voice, really not caring. He shrugs off his sweater, knowing that he’s going to be sweating.

 

Zayn looks him over, eyes narrowing in on his necklace. “Take that off.” He says, gesturing to it.

 

“No.”

 

Zayn raises an eyebrow. “Excuse me?” He asks, walking towards Liam. “I said, take it off.”

 

“And I said no.” Liam crosses his arms. There was no way that necklace was coming off of him. He only ever took it off to shower and sleep, that was it.

 

“Jewelry gets in the way.” Zayn says in a voice that makes it seem like he’s talking to a young child that doesn’t fully understand everything yet. It makes Liam’s blood boil. “Take. It. Off.”

 

“I’ll tuck it in my shirt then.” Liam hisses. Zayn just looks at him for a moment and Liam gets the idea that if they were cartoons, steam would be coming out of his ears.

 

“Fine.” Zayn spits out. “See if I care that someone can use that to choke you. Actually, I hope they do.”

 

Liam takes a deep breath, reminding himself that if he kills Zayn, he’ll probably go to jail for it. He thinks for a moment. Would he really? “I don’t want to be here anymore than you do.” Liam says lowly. “Just teach me how to fight and then we can leave.”

 

“You have to do what I say to be taught, Payne.” Zayn says. “And that includes taking off that necklace.”

 

“The necklace stays on.” Liam presses, not budging on his stand.

 

Zayn’s eyes narrow on him and Liam’s do the same. They stand like that for a couple moments. “Fine.” Zayn finally hisses. “But learn how to wear it so someone can’t use it against you.”

 

Liam tucks it into his shirt, feeling the cold metal pressing up against his chest. “Now teach me.” He says.

 

Zayn rolls his eyes, taking a couple steps forward. “Get in stance.” He says and Liam does what he’s told slowly, checking to make sure that all of his footing is right and- “Wrong.”

 

“I’m in stance.” Liam grits out, annoyed.

 

“No you’re not.” Zayn says, walking over to him with a bored expression. “Your feet are too spread out, your left flank is completely venerable and honestly, what are you expecting to do with fists?”

 

“You didn’t tell me to get a weapon.” Liam bites out, dropping his arms and standing normally.

 

“Do I have to tell you to get a weapon?” Zayn says, “If this was an actual fight-”

 

“It’s not you’re _teaching_ me.” Liam points out.

 

Zayn quiets him with a look. “If this was an actual fight, do you think a solider or demon would wait for you to get your weapon? Let me tell you something, they _won’t._ You should always have a weapon on you, period. It doesn’t matter where you are and if you think you’re safe, the moment you don’t have a weapon on you, you’re dead. Go to the armoury and pick one up.” Liam huffs, walking over to one of the doors. “Armoury’s over here.” Zayn rolls his eyes, opening a door on the other side of the room.

 

Liam’s face flushes with embarrassment but he forces it down as he walks over to the room. On the walls, are weapons of all kinds, some sitting on tables, others hanging from the walls. There’s a spot dedicated to swords which is where Liam walks over to, only ever having used a sword.

 

“What are you doing?” Zayn asks as Liam goes to pick up a familiar size and shape of a sword.

 

“Getting a weapon.” Liam says slowly, “Like you told me to.”

 

Zayn lets out an annoyed sound, walking over to him. “Do you know what that is?”

 

“A sword?” Liam tries, already knowing that Zayn’s looking for its specific name that he really doesn’t know nor does he care about.

 

Zayn rolls his eyes. “That’s an estoc you idiot. You can’t fight with that.”

 

Liam crosses his arms. “And why not?”

 

“Its edges are dull, you can only use the tip of it to inflect harm.” He explains. “You need all the sharp edges you can get. Grab the claymore.”

 

Liam raises an eyebrow, looking around at all the swords. “And that’s…?”

 

Zayn rolls his eyes again, grabbing one of the larger swords off of the wall and handing it to Liam. It looked like the stereotypical sword Liam inspected as he grabs it and Zayn goes over to where the daggers are, grabbing a couple and placing them in his belt before heading over grab a slightly larger one but Liam still think it’s classified as a dagger. He leaves the armoury without another word, Liam trailing after him.

 

The sword feels awkward in his hands, like it always does. He’d tried a number of weapons before, each of them being worse than the last. At least with a sword, he could just swing and hope.

 

“Get in stance again.” Zayn says when they’re both back in the sparring room. Liam gets back to how he was standing, sword up. Zayn rolls his eyes. “Bring your left foot in.” He instructs and Liam does as he’s told, shuffling the foot in wards. “Hold the sword higher and move your right foot back a bit.” He does at too, look at Zayn expectantly.

 

“We’re going to go through basic drills now…” He instructs Liam and for the next two hours he drills Liam over and over again, killing his body in all but the literally way.

 

“This isn’t working.” Zayn finally says after Liam messes up what’s supposed to be a simple move for what feels like the millionth time.

 

“You don’t say.” Liam mutters, putting the sword down and taking a gulp of his water that one of the servants had brought in a bit back.

 

“Take a break.” Zayn mutters, heading back over to the armoury. Liam watches him walk away for a moment before putting his water back down and going over to the rock climbing wall, climbing up to just above the first beam. He jumps down onto it, almost losing his balance but he regains it quickly enough, walking steadily on the beam over to where there are back hoops used to swing across a small break. He grabs the first one, slowly pulling himself across and over to the next section of the beam. He walks along that beam until the one above him is nothing more than a black bar a few feet higher than him. He jumps, grabbing onto the black beam and hanging there for a couple seconds, enjoying the tug on his muscles as Zayn walks back in the room with a couple different weapons. “Typical.” He snorts, not seeing Liam anywhere.

 

“Typical what?” Liam says, swinging on the bar. Zayn’s head looks up at him, his eyes widening only slightly before he gets his face back under control. He swings harder, gaining momentum.

 

“What are you doing.” Zayn says more than he asks.

 

Liam finally gains enough momentum to let go of the bar, allowing himself to go flying into open air. He does a small black flip before landing, managing to get the landing right. He grins to himself. “Having some fun.” He says to Zayn, whose jaw has dropped just slightly. “I knew a girl once, in Idris, one of her father’s mistresses was a mundane with the sight who was a gymnast and the girl spent a few years training. She taught me some tricks.” Liam explains before taking another gulp of water.

 

“Oh yes,” Zayn mutters sarcastically, “because potentially falling to your death is fun.”

 

Liam shrugs, walking over to the weapons Zayn has laid out. He decides it’s probably best to ignore what Zayn just said, instead opting to ask a question. “What’s with all the weapons?”

 

“You can’t use a sword.” Zayn says flatly. “Really, it’s embarrassing trying to watch you use one.” Liam’s face flushes with embarrassment. “I’ve actually never seen someone fight as horribly as you do-”

 

“Your point?” Liam asks in a tense voice.

 

“Anyways,” Zayn says, gesturing to the weapons laid out. “We’re going find out what you _can_ fight with.”

 

“Get rid of the bow and arrows.” Liam says after a moment. “And the daggers.” Zayn moves them to the side. “Can’t use the whip or spear either.”

 

“So anything that you have to aim is out of the question basically?” Zayn says bluntly and Liam nods. He thinks for a moment before heading back into the armoury. He’s back out in a couple moments with three weapons in his hands. “Morning star, battle axe and war hammer.” He says when he’s back, holding up each one and Zayn looks Liam up and down. “You’ve got the strength, judging by the size of your arms.”

 

Liam forces down a blush, trying to ignore the comment on his body before taking the morning star mace from Zayn. It’s heavy in his hands, the iron ball and spikes sitting at the top of it being the obvious reason as why it’s so heavy. “How do you even use this?” He asks dumbly after a moment, hand reaching up to the spikes. He accidentally pricks his finger on it, the spikes being sharper than they look. He sucks the finger into his mouth as Zayn rolls his eyes at his idiocy.

 

“You swing it and hope it hits your target.” He says bluntly. “That’s all there is to it.”

 

Liam places the weapon on the ground beside him, going to take the hammer. He wants to feel each one and see which felt the best in his hands. The hammer was heavier than it looked, feeling a little too barbaric in Liam’s hands. He places it beside the morning star before taking the axe and seeing how that feels.

 

The axe is light, much light than Liam had expected it to be. The handle was long, but not so long that it was awkward. “That’s a one sided axe.” Zayn explains. “The blade is sharp so don’t touch it.” He says pointedly. “You can use one or two hands on it though, whatever’s more comfortable for you. It requires a little more thinking than the morning star or the hammer.”

 

“I like it.” Liam admits, surprising himself. He’d never actually taken to a weapon before.

 

“Most shadowhunters don’t like using these weapons because of how much strength they take.” Zayn explains as he begins to put the other weapons back in the armoury with Liam’s help. “They’re a bit barbaric too.”

 

“Every weapon is barbaric.” Liam mutters, putting the sword up.

 

Zayn shrugs. “Some aren’t.” He says before grabbing a piece of material from off one of the walls. “This is where all the sheaths and stuff like that is kept.” He hands Liam something from the wall. It was a single strap, obviously meant to hang like a sash, with a spot for his axe to be placed in on his back. “You can keep that stuff.” He says with a shrug. “Simon doesn’t care.”

 

Liam nods and they silently put the rest of the stuff away expect for Zayn’s daggers and Liam’s axe. He puts in in the holder and he can’t help but think it feels a little weird, having the axe sit on his back like that. He has to keep reminding himself that no, there’s nothing in the corner of your eye that’s just the axe. They head out of the armoury and back into the training room and Liam’s met with the familiar face of Niall, who’s grinning widely when he sees both boys.

 

“I see you haven’t managed to kill each other yet- mate what the hell is that?” Niall eyes widen at the axe.

 

“Battle axe.” Zayn mutters, stepping past Niall to leave the room.

 

Liam raises an eyebrow. “I thought I still had lessons.”

 

“S’lunch time.” Niall says. “Well, sorta. We don’t all each together but the cook usually makes something around this time. C’mon, we can head to the kitchen together. I think Lou and Harry already ate and Zayn will probably go brood in the library till we’re done.”

 

Liam nods, following Niall out of the training room and over to the kitchen, listening to him chatter on about things that he didn’t fully pay attention to.

 

_______________________________________

 

After lunch, Simon instructs Liam to go to the library to start tutoring Zayn- which, seriously? An entire _day_ with the guy? Liam wanted to bash his head into something. Or bash _Zayn’s_ into something.

 

He takes his time heading to the library, purposely taking bad turns and such so he won’t have to be in Zayn’s presences for as long, but that only manages to detour him for 15 minutes and soon enough, he’s standing in front of the library doors, wondering how pissed Simon would be if he just… didn’t show up.

 

Liam thinks he’d be pretty pissed so he pushes open the heavy library doors with a sigh and he’s greeted with Zayn’s bored voice as soon as he does. “Got lost, I presume.” He says in a flat tone that tells Liam he knew _exactly_ what he had been doing.

 

“It’s a big institute.” Is all he says in reply, walking towards Zayn. He’s sitting on the lower level by a table, books and papers spread around him. “Easy to get lost in.”

 

“I’m sure.” He says dryly.

 

Liam sits across from him gingerly, looking between him and the books warily. “What do you need help with?”

 

Zayn sighs, pushing a book towards Liam before turning his attention back to a piece of paper. He was drawing something on it, as far as Liam can tell but he can’t see what exactly he’s drawing. He looks to the book instead, eyes scanning over the page. “Runes?” He asks.

 

“I can’t remember them.” He explains after a moment, not looking away from his drawing. “As you can imagine, it’s a bit of a problem.”

 

“They just take practice I’m not sur-” Liam starts to say but Zayn looks up at him with a dark look.

 

“Then show me how to practice with them.” He says lowly.

 

Liam pauses for a moment, looking at Zayn with a curious look. “Why?”

 

“Why?” Zayn repeats. “Why do I want to know how to, at any given time, be able to give myself extra strength, speed, agility? Why would I want to be able to help myself and other shadowhunters heal quicker? Gee, I dunno.” He says the last part sarcastically.

 

“Why do you want help.” Liam clarifies, ignoring his comments. He had found that that was the best way to deal with Zayn and his attitude.

 

Zayn sighs, rolls his eyes and turns around in his chair. He push does the top of his shirt, showing Liam a disfigured mark that had scared into his skin. “I was 9 and I had fallen off of a ladder.” He explains in a low voice. It’s not menacing nor was it soft, but low in volume. “My father told me to draw it on myself.” He lets out a small huff of cruel laughter. “Not only was my body not ready for a mark yet, but I managed to draw it wrong. Do you know what that feels like Liam?”

 

Liam shakes his head. He had rumours about the pain of accidentally drawing a rune wrong, how the people had gone through hours- if not days- of agonising pain and always carrying the scar. He couldn’t have imagined going through that at the age of 9. “No.” He says in a softer voice.

 

“Now you know.” Zayn says after a moment. “So teach me.”

 

Liam nods and begins to go over the history of runes. His own father had always taught him that it was best to know the history of anything, understand it, before diving into it.

 

“Wait, why are you telling me this?” Zayn says about half an hour later. They had moved over to the chairs by the fire, Zayn claiming fifteen minutes into their lesson that he was cold and refused to sit in the uncomfortable chairs anymore.

 

Liam shrugs, flipping a page in the book he had been reading from. He wasn’t reading the whole thing, just summarising bits and parts from it here and there. “How do you expect yourself to be able to remember a rune if you don’t know where they come from?”

 

“I just need to know how to memorise them.” He grumbles. “I didn’t want a history lesson.”

 

“Well you’re getting one.” Liam insists before continuing on wards with his lesson, not fully caring if Zayn was actually listening to him or not. It didn’t matter. Simon was only forcing him to _try_ and teach Zayn. He didn’t have to succeed. He slowly works his way through the book, Zayn offering up a question a couple times that Liam does his best to answer. When he finishes the book, he glances at a clock, seeing they still have an hour before dinner was going to be called. He gets up and motions to Zayn to follow him over to where the Gray Book was, and flipping it open to a relatively easy mark, the Soundless mark. “Try and memorise that. Think back to what I told you about the rune to help you memorise it.”

 

Zayn looks at him, looks at the mark and then looks back at him. “This isn’t going to work.”

 

“Not if you don’t try.” Liam says with a shrug. “You wanted help. I’m offering help. Take it or leave it.”

 

Zayn lets out another huff, staring at the rune with an intense look for a couple moments. “Now what.” He grunts after a couple moments.

 

“Draw it on yourself.” Liam says, closing the book. Zayn looks up at him, glaring.

 

“No.”

 

“Fine.” Liam says, shrugging. “See if I care.”

 

Zayn looks at him for a moment. “Shouldn’t I draw it on you? You’re the _tutor._ ” He spits out the last word like venom.

 

Liam stares him down, face twitching for just a moment in anger. “I don’t trust you.” He says lowly, tone of voice cold and distant. “I don’t trust you not to purposely mess it up Malik.”

 

“Of course you don’t.” Zayn spits back. “You don’t trust anyone do you, you sheltered boy. You don’t know what lies past these protect walls, what lies past the protected gates of Idris.” He laughs cruelly. “I suggest you learn to trust the best, because they’re the ones who are going to be saving your lazy, selfish, _weak-”_

 

“I am not weak!” Liam roars, going to attack Zayn. He was so _sick_ of this asshole, trying to insist over and over how much _better_ he was than Liam, how much tougher he was than Liam. “You’re nothing more than your words.” He hisses, breath coming out of his nose in angry puffs, face right up and close with Zayn’s. “You’re nothing more than sharp words, nothing more than the shitty values your monsters of parents taught you!” He laughs cruelly, seeing how wired Zayn is. His next words, despite being spoken quietly, ring louder than a bell in the quiet room. “You’re no better than your parents.”

 

That seems to be it for Zayn. He loses any more pretences, attacking Liam in a blind rage, hands going straight for his throat. He tackles Liam, who was surprised that Zayn was going straight for the kill shot. They wrestle on the floor, both boys trying to inflict as much as physically possible to each other before someone hears the commotion and the other boys are running in, pulling Zayn and Liam apart. It takes both Louis and Niall to hold Liam back as he struggles, wanting nothing more than to harm Zayn.

 

“You’re weak just like your father!” Zayn spits out, still struggling against Harry’s grip.

 

“My father was a good man!” Liam growls out. “ _Yours_ was weak! It doesn’t take strength to kill thousands- it takes strength to stand up!”

 

“You think I don’t know that?” Zayn says, surprising Liam enough that he momentarily stops struggling, listening to the other boy speak. “I know my father was weak and cruel, nothing more than a tyrant. But at least he had the power to stand up to the council, not just siding mindlessly with their bullshit.”

 

“He started a _war_.” Liam says. “He forced brothers to pick sides, tore families apart and ripped loved ones from this earth.” He says it slowly and coldly, trying to force all emotion out of his voice and shove the tears that sprang to his eyes away as thoughts of his mother, father, sister, countless others, came to his mind. “You don’t need to start a war to stand up to the council.” He shakes Niall and Louis off of him, brushing past Zayn and Harry in a furious rage, going straight to his room and shoving his most important belongings into his bag. He wasn’t going to be forced to stay with someone whose parents started a war, much less someone whose parents started the war that left him orphaned. He was going back to Idris.

 

Liam hikes the bag up onto his shoulder, grabbing the battle axe as a second thought before putting a glamour on himself. His glamours were always weak, but they were strong enough that any mundanes wouldn’t look twice at him and he doubted that any demons would come close to an institute. “I doubt there’s even demons in London.” He grumbles to himself as he leaves his bedroom, heading straight for where he knows the front door was. He was out on the streets soon enough, bag on his shoulder and weapon on his back as he walked through a busy London, the glamour doing its job and no one playing any mind to him. Liam does his best to remember where the train station was, heading in what he thinks is the right direction to it. He can’t ask anyone for help, since that would draw attention to himself. The glamour would only work if he didn’t purposely draw attention to himself and freaked out mundanes were the last thing Liam needed.

 

It was dark when Liam finally admitted to himself that he was lost. He wasn’t in a busy part of town anymore, instead by some cheap, sleazy bars and dark alleyways. He does his best to keep his hammering heart quiet, reminding himself that no one could see him.

 

As he walks, Liam can’t help but glance over his shoulder a couple times, especially when he smells something so strong he isn’t sure what it is at first, just completely overwhelmed by it until he realised what it was. Death. He takes a sharp intake of breath, his braining supplying something that would smell so strongly like that. A demon.

 

“ _Why, a young shadowhunter.”_ A voice calls from one of the dark allies, causing Liam to spin around, trying to find the source of it. “ _What are you doing travelling alone on a night like tonight?_ ” It cackles, moving in the darkness and making it impossible to locate. Liam keeps turning in circles though, determined to find it. Kill it.

 

“Hunting.” He lies, well, it’s not a true lie. His intention hadn’t been to hunt when he left the institute, but Liam wasn’t one to turn down a challenge. He unsheathed his axe, holding it steadily in two hands.

 

“ _Oooh don’t tell me I’m your first._ ” It whispers right behind Liam, causing him to flip around. There’s nothing there. “ _Don’t flatter me like that._ ”

 

“You’re not.” He lies again but this one is a true lie. He’d never even seen a demon in real life before.

 

“ _Liar liar pants on fire._ ” It giggled. “ _Isn’t that what all you mundanes say nowadays? I remember when-”_

 

“I’m not interested in what you remember.” Liam says, swinging wildly at something out of the corner of his eye. He misses. “I’m interested in _killing_ you.”

 

“ _But don’t you want to have some fun first?”_ Suddenly, the demon takes full shape, coming out of the shadows. Liam recognises it as an oni almost instantly, its green skin, wide mouths and horns being a dead giveaway. Liam grips his axe tighter, mentally going through everything he knows about onis which, really, isn’t that much. It moves quickly towards Liam and he swings out wildly, still not sure how to fight, and he misses it.

 

The battle is rather short, Liam getting his ass handed to him roughly as the oni easily takes him on, playing with him more than anything. After what feels like hours (probably only minutes) of trying to at least _scratch_ the oni, it manages to get Liam off balanced and he falls, axe spinning out of his grip as the oni grins over top of him, raising its sharp claws to open Liam’s throat. He can’t help but clench his eyes shut tight, hoping it will at least be a quick death when he hears the oni roar out in pain, flipping around to look at who hit him. Liam scrambles away, going straight for his axe. When it’s in his hands, he glances over at whoever hit the oni with a throwing dagger and Liam’s surprised to say the least.

 

Zayn’s fighting the oni with twin daggers in his hands, easily dancing in and out of the demons reach, playing with it. Liam can’t help but watch in awe and amazement as Zayn easily fights it before quickly stabbing the oni in the heart and the creature collapses. “Are you _insane_?” He breaths out, finally looking at Liam. He has a wild look in his eyes, a mix of adrenaline and anger. “Going off into this part of town, alone, at night when you can’t even fight? Do you have a death wish?”

 

“I…” Liam stutters, unsure of what to say or how to even react. “I was trying to get to the train station, I was going to go back to Idris.” He admits in a small voice.

 

“Idiot.” Zayn growls out, wiping his daggers off and putting them back in their sleeves. “I’m bringing you back to the institute.” He turns around, fully expecting Liam to follow him.

 

“No.” Liam says in a quiet voice. Zayn keeps walking, so he repeats himself, but louder. “I said no.”

 

“Excuse me?” Zayn says, turning around and there’s still that same look in his eyes, the wild anger digging into Liam’s mind uncomfortably. “What did you say?”

 

“I said no.” He repeats himself. “I’m going home- to Idris.”

 

“Your home is at the institute.” Zayn says slowly before shaking his head. “I shouldn’t have even saved your sorry, ungrateful ass.”

 

That rising’s Liam’s feathers but he bites his tongue, letting the anger settle before replying. “Thank you.” He grits out, as much as it kills him to. “For saving my life.”

 

Zayn looks at him for a moment. “I wouldn’t have to if you didn’t run off.” He says gruffly.

 

“I wouldn’t have run off if you didn’t attack me.”

 

“I wouldn’t have attacked you if you didn’t call me my parents.” Zayn says in a dangerous tone and Liam bites his lip.

 

“You attacked my father first.” Liam finally says, but they both know it’s a weak argument.

 

Before Zayn can say anything back, the oni is groaning by his feet, wound already healing. “How…” He mutters and Liam’s eyes widen with realisation.

 

“The only way to kill an oni is chop off their horns.” He says in a low voice, heart beating loudly in his chest. “Zayn… I think we should run before it walks up.”

 

“I can just-” Zayn starts to say but the Oni is glowing black, becoming larger and stronger. “Running sounds like a good idea.” He says, taking off in the direction of the institute, Liam hot on his tail and the oni following them.

 

“We can’t out run it!” Liam shouts as they duck into another alleyway.

 

“You don’t happen to have a plan do you?” Zayn growls out and Liam looks around wildly, trying to find something that would help take the oni off guard.

 

“If we can get to water, they can’t swim!” Liam says as they duck behind another building and end up face to face with a dead end. Liam looks around again, seeing a fire escape leading up to a building’s roof and he runs over to it, jumping up to the bottom step and pulling himself up onto the first level of steps. He looks down at Zayn who’s just staring at him. “Come on, we can run along the roofs until we get to Thames.” He offers his hand down to Zayn to grab who just looks at him before glancing back to the ally entrance where the oni just appeared. “Trust me!” Liam says, shoving his hand down farther to Zayn. He grabs it, allowing himself to be pulled up and the two boys climb higher and higher, the oni still following them.

 

They make it onto the roof fine and Liam checks both ways, trying to figure out where the river was. “Left.” Zayn says, voice wavering slightly as he looks at how high they are and Liam remembers him mention how he was scared of heights. “The river is that way.” He repeats, pointing left. “We need to keep moving.” The last comment is more of a mutter, probably directed more to himself than Liam.

 

Liam nods, jogging in the direction to the edge of the roof and he jumps onto the next one, thankful that all of London is so packed close together. He glances behind him, seeing Zayn has paused. “You have to jump!” He calls, seeing the oni reach the roof. “Now Zayn!”

 

Zayn runs, jumping and crashing into Liam as he does so. Liam just pulls them both up, grabbing Zayn’s hand as he does so. He didn’t want to have to keep waiting for him to jump, at least, that was what he told himself. They ran along the roofs, the oni hot on their tails as they head for the riverside, hoping that they could get to the water before the demon catches them. They finally reach the edge of the residential area, and Liam doesn’t even say anything to Zayn, just grips his hand tighter as he jumps off the roof as far as he can, hoping to god they land in the water.

 

They manage to, the icy cold liquid freezing Liam’s bones as soon as they hit the water and he drops Zayn’s hand in shock, holding himself underwater for a couple moments before breaking up against the surface, seeing the oni watching them from the roof top. He hisses loudly at them, before turning around and leaving in a black mist. Liam laughs, adrenaline still high. “Told you it wouldn’t follow us into the water.” Liam says, looking around for Zayn. He doesn’t see him. “Zayn?” He calls, looking around in a circle for the other boy. A fear grips him.

 

What if Zayn couldn’t swim?

 

Liam submerges himself under the water, keeping his eyes open and he looks in a wide circle for Zayn. He catches something in the corner of his eye, turning to look at it. He nearly opens his mouth when he sees him, Zayn, struggling to get to the surface. Liam swims as fast as he possibly can to the other boy, grabbing him from the waist to lift him up. Zayn struggles against Liam at first, but stops when he sees who it is. He pulls them both to the surface, Zayn gasping for breath and coughing as soon as they break through. He clings to Liam, obviously terrified.

 

“I can’t swim you idiot.” He says, trying to be as mean as possible but it comes out weak and a bit scared.

 

“Yeah well, you’re alive.” Liam points out. “You’re welcome.”

 

“I wouldn’t have needed saving if you hadn’t run off.” He grumbles as Liam swims. He decides to go a little farther downstream, not wanting the oni to be waiting for when they get out of the water. He wants to be as close to the institute as possible when they get out.

 

“We’ve been over this.” Liam points out, remembering their conversation from only minutes before.

 

Zayn doesn’t say anything for a few moments, just holds onto Liam tighter as they swim. “I’m sorry for attacking you. And saying those things about your family. And my comments towards you.” He finally says in a quiet voice, softer than Liam had ever heard him speak before.

 

“I’m sorry for comparing you to your parents. And being rude. And judgemental.” Liam says. He doesn’t say he’s sorry for the comments towards Zayn’s parents because he’s not.

 

They’re quiet for a few more strokes before Zayn finally says something. “Can we get out now?” He mutters, looking down at the water and tightening his grip on Liam subconsciously.

 

“Not gonna take my chances.” Liam says with a small shake of his head. “The oni could be following us, I’d like to be as close to the institute as possible when we get out.”

 

Zayn inaudibly grumbles something but doesn’t press it, knowing Liam’s right. The rest of the swim is silent, but it’s not uncomfortable like their usual cold silences are. They make it to the street that the institute is down and Liam swims to the side, grabbing the retaining wall. “Zayn you’re going have to pull yourself out first.” He says. “Grab the wall yeah.”

 

Zayn doesn’t let go. “No.” He mumbles very quietly.

 

“You’ll be fine.” Liam says softly, surprising himself with how nice he’s being to Zayn when he wanted to kill him only hours before. Funny how saving each other’s lives did that. “I’ll hold onto you too ok?”

 

“Fine…” Zayn mutters, reaching up with one hand to grab the wall. Liam takes down his hand, moving both of them to Zayn’s waist while he treads water to keep himself up.

 

“On three.” Liam says as Zayn’s other shaky hand goes to meet the first on the wall. “One… Two… Three.” He says, pushing Zayn’s surprisingly light body up as Zayn pulls himself up. He rolls over, coughing slightly as he does so. Liam grabs the wall, easily pulling his own body out of the water and next to Zayn. “You ok?”

 

Zayn nods after a moment, still breathing heavily. “We should head back to the institute.” He finally says, rolling over onto his stomach so he can get up.

 

Liam nods, standing up as well and hearing his shoes squeak as he does so. “Shit, all my stuff…” He pulls the backpack off his back, looking into it. His clothing he knew would be fine but his photos… He quickly dug around for them, panic seeping into his heart when he can’t find them. He manages to, thankfully, and he looks at the photos. The picture frames had done well to keep most of the water damage out of them and Liam almost wanted to cry of gratefulness. He didn’t know what he would do if they got destroyed.

 

“You ok?” Zayn asks, mirroring Liam’s question from before.

 

“I’m good.” He says, throwing his bag back onto his shoulder. “Let’s just get back.”

 

They walk in silence to the institute, Liam’s shoes squeaking with every step he takes. He knows the first thing he’s going to do when he gets to the institute is take a nice, long, _hot_ shower. They make it there within a few minutes, and as soon as they enter the building, they’re both bombarded with an armful of Niall and Louis. Louis’s hugging Zayn for a few moments longer than Niall and Liam’s hug was, but he figures out that Louis is whispering to him.

 

“Simon’s going to have both of your heads.” Harry says from behind the two boys, shaking his head obviously disappointed. “You especially Zayn. You know what the rules are.”

 

Zayn shrugs when Louis lets go of him. “You know why I did it.”

 

Harry just looks at Zayn before glancing to Liam with the tiniest of head shakes. “Simon’s expecting you both in the dining hall…” He seems to remember that they’re both dripping wet. “You can shower first, I suppose. I’ll tell Simon you’re returned.”

 

They all head off, Harry towards the dining hall and while Liam and Zayn head to their respected rooms, Niall trailing after Liam, demanding to know what happened and why they were wet.

 

“So, wait,” Niall says after Liam finishes retelling the story as quickly as he can. “You faced off against an oni and went swimming in the Thames?” He clarifies.

 

Liam sighs. “Yeah. And I’d really like to shower so if you’d leave…”

 

Niall puts his hands up in defence. “Leaving, leaving. I’m just surprised you didn’t leave Zayn for dead.”

 

“He did save my life.” Liam points out, tugging off his wet shirt with a grimace. “I’m gonna go shower now. You can wait… or whatever.” He shrugs, heading into the bathroom and dropping his wet clothes and bag onto the tiled floor before jumping into the shower. He quickly cleans himself, not really worrying that much about it because he knows the longer he keeps Simon waiting, the more anger will have built up.

 

He’s done with his shower in a few minutes, and he quickly dries himself off and wraps a towel around his waist and goes out to his room. “But, ok, an oni?” Niall says as soon as he walks out and Liam wants to be surprised that he’s there, but he’s honestly not. It surprises him how quickly he’s adapted to living with the other boys.

 

“An oni.” Liam confirms with a shake of his head and a small smile. He pulls out a pair of dry boxers he had left behind (he honestly didn’t pack that much clothes and tugs them on under his towel before letting it drop. He grabs some sweats and a loose shirt too, tugging them on quickly before at the last moment grabbing socks to put on as well.

 

“I thought those were Japanese though?” Niall asks.

 

Liam shrugs. “Yeah, they are. I guess they’ve immigrated.”

 

Niall laughs, shaking his head as he throws an arm around Liam’s shoulder and the two of them head towards the dining hall where they both know Simon is waiting. They’re just getting near when they can already hear someone yelling inside. Niall pales, “I’m gonna… go.” He mutters, patting Liam on the back. “Good luck mate.”

 

Liam nods and finishes his walk towards the door where Louis is waiting outside looking extremely nervous and Liam can’t understand why. Simon was just going to lecture them, right? He takes a deep breath, pushing on the door and going inside.

 

“…You _know_ you’re not allowed to leave these walls yet you did!” He yells at Zayn. Zayn is sitting down at one of the chairs while Simon paces in front of him and his body language is all off. His hand is resting on his dagger and everything about him screams tense and defensive. Liam remembers the scars Zayn had showed him the other day and he bits his lip, knowing how every bone in Zayn’s body must be screaming at him to defend himself.

 

“He saved my life.” Liam says, surprising everyone in the room- including himself. “I wouldn’t be alive if Zayn didn’t come after me. We- I ran into an oni and it was about to kill me when Zayn stepped him.”

 

“Don’t think you’re not getting punished.” Simon says, pointing a finger at him. “Running off like that? Irresponsible and utterly idiotic. You’re not in Idris anymore, the only protection you have against demons is this institute and your abilities- which are severely lacking.”

 

“I know that now.” Liam says, biting down the urge to tell Simon that no one told him that there would be demons around every corner. “I… Zayn shouldn’t be getting yelled at, is all. He saved my life after I was nothing but a jerk to him. If anyone’s getting punished, it should be me.”

 

Simon is quiet for a few moments. “Zayn knew the rules. He’s not allowed to leave the institute.”

 

“Surely rules have exceptions.” Liam presses, not understanding why the rule was in place. Everyone here seemed to trust him. “He saved my life.”

 

“The council will see it as him trying to escape.”

 

“We can just explain-”

 

“You don’t explain things to the council.” It was the first thing Zayn had said the entire time. “They take and they punish. They won’t _let_ you explain.” There’s a look of high disdain on his face.

 

Liam frowns. “I’m sure-”

 

Simon shakes his head. “Zayn is right.” He admits with a low, tired sigh. “A member representing the council is already on their way here to deem a fit punishment for you. We’re to…” He trails off, obviously not liking what he had been told.

 

“Lock me up again?” Zayn says with a roll of his eyes but Liam sees a flash of panic behind them.

 

“Yes.” Simon says. “Harry will show you the way-”

 

Zayn waves him off, getting up. “I know how to get there. I lived down there for almost half a year, remember?” He gives Simon a cold smile before leaving the room.

 

Liam wants to ask why they have to lock him up again but then he remembers. Zayn’s a _Malik_. The concil doesn’t trust him and probably still thinks that he would run away if given the chance. “He’s back though.” Liam points out after a few moments of silence. “They can’t say he was running away because he _came back._ If we could just-”

 

“You’re a boy.” Simon finally says, interrupting him. “Your father kept you away from everything political because he knew how cruel the world was and he wanted to keep you as ignorant to its cold ways for as long as possible but you’re a boy, Liam. You don’t understand how politics work. You can’t just explain to the council that they’re only leverage to the Maliks left the institute only to help find a runaway. They won’t take it.” Simon runs his hair and Liam’s shocked because Simon doesn’t seem like the type of person to purposely mess something up in his primp and proper image. “We’ll be lucky if they let him stay here.”

 

“All because he left to find me?” Liam asks in a small voice, feeling incredibly guilty.

 

“Yes.”

 

_______________________________________

 

“Harry, I _told_ you I don’t need to be watched.” Zayn says when Liam goes to visit him down in the dungeons. They were cold, dark and damp and Liam really didn’t think it was fit for any human to be living down here. “I’m not a child.”

 

“And I’m not Harry,” Liam says, leaning against the cell door across from Zayn’s cell. Zayn’s lying on the cot in the cell and he takes his arm off of his eyes, looking over at Liam.

 

“What’re you doing here?” He asks, “Did Harry send you?”

 

Liam shakes his head. “No… I uh… I came to apologise, actually.”

 

Zayn snorts, letting his eyes fall shut. “We seem to be doing a lot of that today. So, what’d you do this time?”

 

“I got you locked up in here.” Liam says, gesturing at the cell. “If I hadn’t run away, you wouldn’t have left and-”

 

“We’ve been over this twice before already.” Zayn mumbles, cracking open an eye. “Don’t mention it.”

 

Liam’s jaw drops. “Don’t-?” He begins to say. “Zayn you saved my life and in return you’re locked up, waiting punishment from a council member who doesn’t even know what happened!”

 

Zayn shrugs, closing his opened eye. “Could be worse.”

 

“How?” Liam says, not seeing how much worse this situation could get.

 

“I could be back with my parents.” He says it so nonchalantly Liam almost doesn’t catch the meaning behind the words, the underlining terror in his voice that barely even made itself known.

 

“Zayn…” Liam says slowly and soft, moving to sit against Zayn’s cell door, letting his head rest against one of the bars. “What happened with, um-”

 

“My parents?” He clarifies. “What can I say, they were shitty abusive assholes who started a war.” He laughs, but it’s flat and cold. “I was 5, maybe 6, the first time my mother hit me. Just a slap around the face. I started crying and my father locked me in a small chest for hours. By the time I was 9, I had already killed demons but I wasn’t good enough to my mother or father. It was still hit after hit, kick after kick, slap after slap. Any sign of weakness and I was put into a chest. I once went a full 2 days inside of it.” He says the last comment offhandedly, like it was no big deal but Liam can’t help but let out a small gasp of horror.

 

“Zayn…” He trails off, unsure what to say. Zayn carries on talking as if Liam hadn’t even opened his mouth.

 

“When I turned 11, that’s when they started the war and we went off into hiding. The stress was worse on my parents or maybe it wasn’t even stress.” There’s something warm behind Liam, in between the bars. Zayn’s body. Liam slips his hand through one of the bars and Zayn rests his own on top of it. “My schedule consisted of recruiting demons, killing demons, killing shadowhunters, going home, getting beat and- if I was lucky, only an hour in the chest. My youngest sister, Safaa… They killed her a few days before I was taken. They put her in the chest and forgot about her. She starved to death.”

 

Zayn’s grip tightens on Liam’s hand and Liam squeezes back, offering the only comfort he can think of. Not only had Zayn’s parents abused him, but they also killed his younger sister… Liam couldn’t imagine a life like that and he wouldn’t have wished it on anyone.

 

“How… How old was she?” Liam whispers.

 

“11.” Zayn says in a small voice. “She was… She was great.” He lets out a breathy laugh. “Wasn’t the best fighter so it was- it was up to me, Waliyha and Doniya- my other sisters- to help protect her from my parents… the four of us were close.” He explains, rubbing and thumb over Liam’s soft skin. His finger tips are rough, years of callouses from practising fighting, Liam guesses. “She was a genius though. She could recite every word from every book she ever read.”

 

“She sounds nice.” Liam says softly, letting Zayn play with his fingers as a distraction.

 

“She was…” Zayn trails off. “What about you? Your family?”

 

Liam shrugs. “They were- they were great.” He says honestly. “My dad was more of a homebody than my mother was, funnily enough. He did all the cooking and cleaning and such, mum couldn’t stand it. They were both good fighters though, my dad… He… The council respected him because of his skills. He taught both my sisters how to fight but it never interested me. I was into reading, climbing- gave my parents quite a few heart attacks with that, actually. My sister, Ruth, a few years back, she was part of a new group going undercover and their- they got bombed on their way to their meet up point.”

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

Liam shrugs, letting a couple tears fall. “She’s better off, not having the memories of being part of a war. My other sister, Nicola, she’s still out there. She’s undercover in Hong Kong, last I heard.” He lets a quick quirk of a smile cover his lips. “Now she’s a fighter. My dad was always so proud of her, of how well she could fight. As soon as she picked up his sword, everyone knew how much of a natural she was at fighting. Ruth was the same way, took her just a little longer to learn the basics though.” He laughs softly. “They were always trying to one up each other.”

 

“And you?”

 

“I couldn’t care less about violence.” Liam says. “I didn’t understand why the council just didn’t try and talk to your family, get to the bottom of the issue with words and find a way to fix it that way. I didn’t understand why blood needed to be spilt.” He pauses for a moment, thinking over his next words. “I still don’t, not really.”

 

“To make a point.” Zayn replies and Liam can feel him shrug behind him. “Show that you’re serious.”

 

“You can be serious without killing innocent people.” Liam says quietly and the two boys fall into a soft silence, Zayn’s thumb still rubbing circles on Liam’s hand. “Look up us.” Liam laughs softly, letting his head fall back and rest on the bar.

 

“What’d you mean?”

 

“Yesterday I wanted to kill you. A few hours ago you tried to strangle me.” Liam points out. “Now we’re sharing sob stories.”

 

Zayn laughs softly as well and Liam can’t help but compare it to twinkling bells. “Look at us.” He repeats in a soft voice.

 

They sit there, softly trading secrets about their past. Liam talks the most, sharing how close he was with all of his family members, talking about how much he loves them and misses them, how he’s barely had time to even grieve over his parents before he was shipped off to the institute and how everything had been so fast pace then. “Not that I don’t like it here.” Liam says, feeling the need to explain. “I just… I miss my home, my bed you know? I want to be able to crawl into my parent’s bed and just have a nice cry.”

 

Zayn makes a noise, not one of agreement but just one that says he understand what Liam’s saying. “You should probably go.” He finally says after a few moments longer of silence. “It must be late.”

 

Liam shrugs. “I’m fine here.” He doesn’t like the damp dungeon, of course not, but he didn’t want Zayn to be stuck down here all alone.

 

“Go to bed Liam.” Zayn presses but Liam just stakes his head.

 

“Nope.” He grins, glancing over his shoulder to look at Zayn who was already look at him.

 

“You’re stubborn, anyone ever tell you that?” Zayn says with a very small smile and Liam’s heart flutters at the sight of it.

 

He forces down a blush that’s coming up (over a stupid _smile_ , he scolds himself) and shrugs. “My whole family is.” He laughs at the memory of his family getting in fights. “Ruth and my mum were the worst. They would but heads over everything and neither of them wanted to compromise. I remember this one time, it was near Christmas and Ruth wanted to put the angel on the tree but my mum insisted that that year it was Nicola’s year when it was actually mine-” Zayn laughs and Liam bites on his bottom lip as his own smile tugs across them. “So my dad snuck me around the tree while they were all arguing over it and lifted me up and helped me put the angel on the tree. It took them over an hour to figure out it was already up.”

 

“They sound so nice.” Zayn admits moments later in a small voice. “Your family, I mean.”

 

“They were, yeah.” Liam says just as softly, letting his eyes flutter shut as the memories of his family wash over him. It felt as if there was a weight being lifted off of his chest as he talked about them, something he hadn’t gotten the chance to do yet. It was nice.

 

“I’m sorry.” Zayn whispers, voice barely audible. “It’s my fault they’re dead-”

 

“Hey, hey.” Liam interrupts, frowning. “You didn’t start this war, it’s not your fault.” He almost wanted to laugh at the full 180 he’d done in the past 24 hours. Just the day before he would’ve let Zayn take the blame for his parents’ deaths.

 

“It still feels like it.” His voice cracks on the last word. “I’m so sor-”

 

“Shhh…” Liam says, wanting nothing more than to wrap Zayn’s smaller body up in a tight hug and protect him from everything. “It’s gonna be ok, I promise.”

 

Zayn lets out a watery laugh. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

 

_______________________________________

 

Liam ends up falling asleep down in the dungeon that night, even if he was sitting down on the cold, hard ground. Something about being in Zayn’s presence was calming to him. He tried not to think about it too hard. The next morning he woke when he heard voices talking loudly as they came down to the dungeons.

 

“… He’s fit in nicely-” A familiar voice- Simon, Liam’s sleepy brain supplied helpfully- said.

 

“We don’t care about how the boy feels.” An unfamiliar voice snaps. It’s female, but it’s cold and cruel as she talks about Zayn. “He’s a prisoner. He shouldn’t even be at an institute, he should be in the city of bones, kept away from everyone.”

 

“He’s only a child, he’s not even 18 yet.” Simon protests as they come into the dungeons. He blinks when he sees Liam there. “Liam. The others have been looking for you.”

 

“I’m sorry sir.” He replies, getting up. He hears Zayn groan lowly from behind him and he’s unsure on whether or not he woke the other boy. He doesn’t look behind him to check. “I fell asleep talking to Zayn last night.”

 

The woman looks at him with a surprised look in her eyes. She’s got blonde hair but at the roots, it’s greying, showing that she’s older than she really looks. She has on a pant suit and her heels clack loudly against the stone when she walks. “My name is Caroline.” She introduces herself. “Caroline Flack.”

 

The last name doesn’t ring any bells with Liam so he decides she probably isn’t that high up or important in or to the council. “Liam Payne ma’am.” He replies, not moving. Liam hears Zayn move behind him, getting up off the floor.

 

“Ah, what a beautiful face to see this early in the morning.” Zayn says sarcastically. “Carrie, was it?”

 

“Caroline.” She snaps, obviously not in the mood to deal with Zayn’s sarcasm and Liam wants to hit his own head off a wall. Did Zayn not realise that being a dick to her wasn’t going to help his case? “And I’ve come to take you to the city of bones.”

 

“Ms. Flack,” Simon says from behind her, “I thought you agreed to let Zayn explain himself before making a decision-”

 

“Well that was before I saw him.” She says with an evil glint in her eyes and an eviller smile tugging across her lips.

 

“Ma’am,” Liam says, eyes going wide. “If you just let us explain what happened-”

 

She rolls her eyes, already going for the keys hanging on the wall just behind Liam. “I have no interests in listening to that scum.” She says.

 

“Then listen to me.” Liam says firmly, tone surprising everyone in room but Zayn. He smirks at Liam but there’s something unreadable in his eyes that almost makes Liam want to duck his head sheepishly. He doesn’t though. “ _I_ ran away, not Zayn. I… I was feeling homesick and I just wanted to go back home to Idris.” He leaves out the bit about their fight, knowing it would only harm Zayn. “I ran into an oni and it was about to kill me before Zayn interrupted it and we ran back to the institute.”

 

She purses her lips, as if considering the story. “Onis are Japanese. They wouldn’t be in England.” She gives him a fake smile. “Pick a better monster next lie.”

 

Liam forces the anger down. “I’d swear on the mortal sword if I had to.” He says lowly, proving how serious he is. “Zayn is at no fault. I would be _dead_ if he didn’t save me.”

 

“Well… Some councilmen will want to come to conduct a trial.” She actually sticks her nose up and stalks out of the dungeon, much to Liam’s disbelief.

 

Liam turns around to face Zayn though, grinning at him. “Eh?” He says, unable to help it. “Told you we could explain.”

 

Zayn’s jaw has dropped ever so slightly as he listened to Liam force an explanation on Caroline. “Liam…” He says, eyes wide.

 

Simon walks over to the keys with a small laugh before unlocking the cage before hanging the keys back up. “I’ll have the cook warm up some breakfast for the two of you but I expect you to continue with your training today.”

 

“But-” Liam starts to say. Shouldn’t they get a break?

 

“No, he’s right.” Zayn says, closing the cage door behind him as he leaves it. “Demon’s don’t rest and we shouldn’t either.”

 

Liam grumbles under his breath but ultimately doesn’t say anything as the two of them head back upstairs in a comfortable silence. They eat their lunch with minimum talking too, but the silence (or words, for that matter) isn’t tense or awkward like it used to be between the two boys. They don’t mention the trial that Zayn’s going to have to face, especially not since Liam knows it won’t be a fair one. He just wishes he could do something to make the council see sense about Zayn, that he shouldn’t be a prisoner. If anything, he should be protected from the Malik family. He’s been hurt most by this war.

 

“I’m gonna go get my axe from my room.” Liam says after he finishes his food. “I’ll meet you in the training room?”

 

Zayn nods, but doesn’t say anything. Liam hesitates as he gets to the door, unsure if he was allowed to say something, and if he _should,_ he didn’t know what to say. How do you offer comfort to someone who you used to hate only the day before, someone who was dealt probably the shittiest hand in life? Liam just bites his lip before ducking his head and ducking out of the kitchen, heading back to his own room to pick up his axe. He changes when he gets back to his room, opting out of his dirty sweats for training clothes before grabbing his axe. It seemed to hum happily when Liam picked it up but he knew he was only imagining things. Weapons were inanimate objects, of course, but… Liam couldn’t help but think of some of the stories his father would tell him about how a shadowhunter’s true weapon seemed to react to the shadowhunter’s thoughts and moods before the shadowhunter even knew what he was truly thinking. He brushes away the thought but it stays in the back of his head as he walks to the training room.

 

Zayn’s already in the room when Liam gets there, practising with his knives on a dummy. Liam stops at the door, mouth opened slightly in surprise as he watches Zayn gracefully dance around the dummy, acting as if it was alive and could actually fight back. His breathing is getting heavier as he keeps practising, a thin sheet of sweat covering his forehead as Liam watches him work, listening to his little grunts as he stabs the dummy. Liam’s not sure how long he was standing there, plainly watching Zayn fight rather beautifully (a word Liam never thought he’d ever call violence) but soon enough, Zayn ends his practice and dance by quickly stabbing the dummy with one knife in the gut and slitting it’s throat with the other one.

 

“One to the gut for pain,” He says, turning around to look at Liam. “One to the throat for death.”

 

“The first one is a little… Morbid.” Liam can’t help but say, walking farther into the room to stand by Zayn.

 

Zayn shrugs. “They’ve caused pain to shadowhunters and mundanes alike, why shouldn’t they fall at the hands of it?”

 

Liam frowns, just slightly. He knows what Zayn is saying and, in a sense, he agrees. The demons deserve to die because they’re wrong and they’re evil but he can’t… “Wouldn’t it just be better to just quickly kill them?” He asks, always the bleeding heart. “They caused pain yeah, but causing them pain before their inevitable death doesn’t take back the pain they caused.”

 

Zayn just stares at him for a couple moments, blinking, as if he’d never seen Liam before. “She used to say the same thing.” He states after a moment and Liam knows that he’s talking about Safaa. He’s not sure how he knows, he just does. “I used to try and teach her how to fight, the basics, to protect herself if… if we weren’t around. She would always tell me to just end their lives, that causing more suffering doesn’t take away the suffering that was already there, that it only made the world a little darker.”

 

Liam offers him a soft smile. “She seems like she was a smart girl.”

 

“She was.” Zayn says quietly, nodding. There’s a soft silence that falls over them for a few minutes as Zayn closes his eyes tightly and takes a sharp breath. “We need to work on your basic stance and beginner moves.” He says after a moment, obviously changing the topic.

 

Liam nods, moving over to where they’d have more room to practice and trying to recreate how he was standing in their first lesson, holding his axe in two hands. “This good?”

 

“Left foot back and in just a bit.” Zayn advises and Liam does as he’s suggested. “Yeah, like that.”

 

They run over drills for a small while, the only sounds shared between them are Zayn’s instructions and Liam’s heavy breathing paired with a few grunts. Liam can’t help but admit to himself that fighting like this, fighting with his axe, feels right in a way that fighting with a sword or dagger never did.

 

“You’re not bad.” Zayn admits while their having a water break.

 

Liam grins at him. “Did it kill you to admit that?”

 

Zayn rolls his eyes but it’s not like how he rolled his eyes at Liam before, all cold and sarcastic. This eye roll is more… fond, really. It’s the only word Liam can come up with right now but it still seems fitting. “Very funny.” Zayn says sarcastically before taking a gulp of water from his water bottle. Liam can’t help but watch his Adam’s Apple as it bobs up and down slightly, biting into his lower lip as he does so. Before Zayn can catch him looking, though, he looks away and picks up his own water, drinking it quickly, hoping the cold liquid will cool him down.

 

“I like to think I’m hilarious.” Liam finally says after he swallows, giving Zayn a quick grin.

 

“Hate to break it to you.” Zayn jokes, cracking a very small smile that nearly stops Liam’s heart. He’s sure that he’s never seen Zayn smile before, so even seeing this small one, it was… Liam didn’t even have words for it. It seemed to change his entire face, eyes glinting mischievously in a way that Liam hopes happens more often (he thinks they might sparkle like that if they lived in a different life, a different time, if they were different people).

 

“Yeah, well…” Liam trails off, unsure of what to say. He was caught off guard by the smile Zayn shared with him only seconds ago. “Whatever.” He refrains from sticking his tongue out childishly.

 

Zayn rolls his eyes, just as fondly (the right word to describe it) as before and Liam does his best to ignore the fluttering that’s happening to his heart. He wasn’t supposed to like this boy much less _like him_ like him _._ “C’mon, back at it.”

 

Liam’s face scrunches up. “Can’t I do something else?” His body itches to climb and Zayn raises an eyebrow at him and Liam blushes. “I just mean it’s boring. I’m not even practising on a dummy.”

 

Zayn lets out a breath of air, thinking it over. “Ok.” He agrees and the two boys move over to where the dummy is and they move themselves so Liam’s in front of the dummy and Zayn stands behind him, off to the side slightly. “Ok, so, it’s going to feel awkward at first.” He says, “But you have to act like the dummy is a demon. Think of it as a real, live thing that wants to kill you. The only way you’re going to survive is if you kill it.” He says, placing a hand on Liam’s shoulder lightly, thumbing brushing his neck. His fingers are colder than what Liam expected, but just as rough, calloused from years of fighting.

 

Liam nods, trying to put himself into the right mind set before beginning. It’s hard than it was just jabbing at air. He has to work to actually hit his mark, his mark being the coloured dots on the dummy for pressure points. He misses quite a few times, hitting them even less but Liam keeps at it, sweat dripping onto his face as he breathes heavily, doing his best to hit and slice certain spots just like how Zayn taught him. He pauses for a moment, only to shove his hair out of his eyes before going to swipe at the dummy’s knees and he accidentally cuts the whole thing off. “Uh.” He says, looking to Zayn. “I don’t think I was supposed to damage it this badly.” He stages whispers, looking back at the leg stump that now has stuffing falling out of it.

 

Zayn snorts a laugh and shrugs. “S’cool. There’s, like, thousands in the back. Dunno where they get them all, honestly.”

 

Liam can’t help but laugh as well and a rather genius idea comes to his mind, causing him to grin at Zayn. “Let me try and fight you.”

 

Both of Zayn’s eyebrows raise. “You can’t.”

 

“Well, I mean, duh.” Liam says. “But it’ll be fun. You can kick my ass even going easy on me _and_ I’ll be getting some extra training actually sparring with someone who can fight back.”

 

Zayn pauses, thinking it over for a moment before nodding. “Fine, fine.” He agrees, offering Liam the tiniest hint of a smile before reaching down to get the daggers he put in his boots.

 

“You’re so good you don’t even need a sword to fight me?” Liam jokes, knowing Zayn is that good.

 

He snorts. “I’m so good I wouldn’t even need a weapon to beat you.”

 

“Cocky.”

 

Zayn winks at him causing Liam’s face to go a light pink. “Wouldn’t you like to know.” He teases before getting into the proper stance, Liam following his lead. “You can tap out whenever.” He grins, a cocky glint in his eyes.

 

Liam rolls his eyes but there’s a huge grin covering his face so it doesn’t really count. “To first blood or-”

 

“First blood.” Zayn cuts him off.

 

He nods and double checks that he’s in the right starting position before nodding again to Zayn and they’re off. Zayn just sort of grins at him slowly, moving quickly and swiftly, going straight for it. Liam does his best to block him, only seconds in and he’s already sweating, hair sticking to his forehead as Zayn taunts him. Liam can’t help but pout slightly, blocking Zayn before trying to hit part of him. He misses. “You suck.” He grumbles but it’s light hearted and Zayn, surprisingly, laughs, short but loud.

 

“Don’t you wish.” He grins, causing Liam’s heart to flutter and gut to tighten. He gets momentarily distracted and that’s all it takes for Zayn to kick him on the stomach. “I win.”

 

Liam laughs, unable to help it. “Like you were going to lose.” He says.

 

“Lasted longer than I thought you would.” Zayn says, putting his daggers back into his boots after wiping the one with a bit of blood on it on his shirt.

 

“That couldn’t have been more than a minute long.” Liam points out.

 

Zayn nods. “47 seconds. I didn’t think you’d last ten.” He smirks and Liam just bumps him with his shoulder.

 

“Show off.” He says and Zayn just grins at him, causing another wave of butterflies to act up in Liam’s stomach. He does his best to ignore them. “Again.” He demands, grinning at Zayn. “And I bet I can last a minute this time.”

 

Zayn laughs, nodding, going to grab his daggers again. “Want me to go easier on you too?” He teases.

 

“Nah I can do it.” Liam insists, already getting into the starting stance. “M’gonna kick your ass one day, just you wait Zayn.”

 

“Doubt it.” He snorts, easily settling into his own stance. He looked so natural, holding the two daggers. His eyes seemed playful but calm at the same time, knowing that this was only a bit of fun and taking a small bit of pride in the fact that he can easily beat Liam.

 

Liam shrugs. “Doesn’t hurt to have a dream.” He jokes as Zayn rolls his eyes.

 

“Let’s just fight you dork.” He says, voice going softer than Liam’s heard him speak before. “3… 2… 1.”

 

They’re off again, Zayn using the same tactic as before. He teases Liam with small pokes, never breaking skin and never staying still long enough for Liam to even think about trying to hit him. It’s rather infuriating but Liam can’t help but laugh aloud as he misses Zayn yet again, blocking another hit as quickly as it can. The cool metal brushes his skin but it doesn’t break through so the fight continues and Liam gets an idea. He watches Zayn’s feet as much as he can and a couple moments later, manages to stick his foot out at just the right moment and throw Zayn off balance. Zayn’s eyes widen slightly before he grabs Liam’s shirt, pulling him down with him as they fall towards the floor. As soon as they hit it, Zayn’s rolling them over so he’s on top, straddling Liam’s hips and locking his wrists above his head. He smirks at Liam. “A minute twenty.” He says, voice just a little breathless as he grins down at Liam.

 

Liam grins back up at him, “Told you I could last a minute.” He says, letting his body melt against the mats slightly. “Next thing you know, I’ll be winning.”

 

Zayn snorts, “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” He says dryly and Liam uses his distraction to quickly flip the two of them over so he’s on top now. Their faces are closer together now too, and Liam can’t help but notice how beautiful Zayn is. When he first saw Zayn, he saw how good looking the boy was (there was no denying that Zayn was the most beautiful person he’d ever laid eyes on) when they first met but then he was so blinded by his misplaced anger that he didn’t realise that Zayn had a beautiful personality too. He’s seen bits of it now, the playful jokes and soft eyes and it does nothing to stop the fluttering in Liam’s tummy. “What’re you think about?” Zayn asks him softly, nose lightly brushing Liam’s as if to offer some sort of comfort.

 

“You.” Liam admits in a whisper. “I’m sorry.” He bumps Zayn’s nose back with his own, cheeks tinted pink at how close they were.

 

“What for?” Zayn asks, eyebrow cocked just slightly in curiosity.

 

Liam shrugs a bit, “I judged you without knowing you.” He says. “I shouldn’t have done that… You’re actually not too bad.” He jokes, trying to lighten the situation.

 

Zayn laughs quietly, smiling at him. “S’all right. If it was the other way around, I would have done the same thing.”

 

Liam frowns slightly, forehead tightening up as his eyebrows move closer together. “Doesn’t mean I was right to do that.”

 

Zayn reaches up, finger smoothing over Liam’s forehead and making the muscles relax. “Maybe.” Zayn agrees, hand moving down to his cheek, brushing at the skin softly. “But we all have our flaws.”

 

Liam quirks a small smile at him, cheeks heating to a soft red as he leans down closer. He moves close enough that he can feel Zayn’s warm breath on his lips but he doesn’t close the small space between them. “I want to kiss you.” He admits softly, lips brushing just slightly against Zayn’s as he whispers.

 

“I want you to kiss me.” Zayn says back but he doesn’t wait for Liam to make the move to close the space between them, instead he goes for it. Zayn’s lips are chapped and kind of rough against Liam’s but he likes the way they feel against his. He keeps his hand on Liam’s face, thumb rubbing softly against the skin a couple times as they kiss slowly. Both boys are unsure of exactly what they’re doing and what they’re going to do after they stop kissing but Liam shoves those worries to the back of his head, focusing on the small boy lying beneath him, giving him all the attention and being as soft as possible. Zayn deserves that at the very least.

 

_______________________________________

 

The two boys head back to Zayn’s room, smiles on their faces and a giddy feeling in both of their chests as they stumble into his room, Liam pressing a quick peck to Zayn’s lips as they close the door behind them. Liam doesn’t notice in the low lighting of the room, but Zayn’s cheeks are coloured a soft red. Zayn kisses Liam as soon as he pulls away, not wanting Liam to leave him. “No.” He mumbles in a pouty voice, grip tightening on Liam. “Don’t leave.”

 

Liam chuckles softly as he’s hit with a strong wave of fondness for the other boy. “I wasn’t planning on it.” He promises back, feeling more like himself than he’s felt in days. It was sort of amazing what Zayn did to him, how he made Liam feel. He’d felt everything from anger and hatred to pity to a soft fondness for the other boy.

 

Zayn pulls back only a little bit, just so Liam can see his wicked grin. “Good.” He says before attaching his lips to Liam’s in a fiery kiss, fingers immediately going into Liam’s short hair to hold onto as Liam moans into his mouth.

 

Liam’s own hands slip around Zayn’s tiny waist, pressing their lower halves closer together, grinding his hips a little bit against Zayn’s. “Like that?” He says in a breathy voice when Zayn lets out a low groan as he moves his lips to Liam’s neck, biting and sucking lightly, making his mark on Liam’s skin. Liam lets out a small whine, gripping Zayn’s hips tightly in an effort to try and control himself.

 

“Like that?” Zayn says, clearly mocking what Liam had said early but Liam couldn’t really care less because all he wants now is to get off and possibly even get in Zayn. Or have Zayn get in him. He moans at the thought.

 

“Bed.” Liam begs, already pulling their bodies over to the bed in the middle of the room. He moves them so that when they fall onto it, Zayn’s already underneath him, looking like- like something Liam can’t even find the words to describe. He knows Zayn isn’t an angel- he won’t lie to himself and say Zayn hasn’t hurt anyone- but Liam thinks that he’s as close as a human (or nephlim) can get to angelic. He lowers his lips to Zayn’s again, kissing him passionately while his hands wander under Zayn’s shirt, fluttering lightly over his abs. They’re not as defined as Liam’s arm, but there’s no denying how fit Zayn is.

 

“Actually touch me.” Zayn says breathlessly, arching his back off the bed. “Want you too. M’not a delicate flower Liam.”

 

“You’re as pretty as one.” Liam can’t help but say, even though it’s probably one of the cheesiest things to have ever come out of his mouth.

 

Zayn rolls his eyes, but his cheeks betray him and are tinted pink in a soft blush. “Yeah, well…” Zayn starts to say but Liam cuts him off with another kiss, this one filthier than the one before. He moves his lips to Zayn’s neck after a couple moments, biting and sucking softly, intending to leave a mark on the other boy. He grins against the skin when Zayn moans his name loudly. “Fuck, hurry up and touch me.” Zayn demands, grinding his hips up against Liam.

 

Liam lets out a groan, grinding down in search of the rough friction but it’s not enough for either of them so they reluctantly part far enough to shuck off all of their clothes. As soon as they’re naked, Zayn’s taking control of the situation, pushing Liam to lay down before climbing on top of the larger boy with a wicked grin. Liam can’t help but shudder in arousal as a wave of heat goes down to his dick. “You like being in control?” Liam teases but he can’t deny how hot it is- Zayn controlling him, Zayn having all of this power over him.

 

Zayn leans down, kissing a soft trail down Liam’s body. “Something like that.” He hums before taking one of Liam nipples into his mouth and suckling on it for a moment. Liam can’t help but buck his hips up, groaning in pleasure before Zayn lets go of it. He gives the other nipple the same treatment before continuing his trail down to Liam’s dick, teasing around the base and on Liam’s thighs, but never actually taking Liam’s dick into his mouth.

 

“You gonna touch it anytime soon?” Liam moans as Zayn bites down on a particularly sensitive part of his thigh.

 

Zayn licks over the bite before looking up at Liam with hooded eyes. “No need to be so bossy.” He hums softly before taking the tip of Liam’s dick into his mouth and guiding Liam’s hand into his hair. Liam’s grip tightens on the dark, soft hair as Zayn moves up and down his dick. Zayn hums around his dick, moving his hand up and down what he can’t fit into his mouth and Liam nearly shoots his load.

 

“Fuck, babe,” Liam moans, his grip tightening even farther on Zayn’s hair. “I’m gonna come if you don’t stop like, right now.”

 

Zayn pulls off of his dick with obscene ‘pop’, looking up at Liam with a wicked grin before moving back up his body. “You wanna top?” He asks with a smirk. “Wouldn’t mind having you use your muscles on me.” He tries to seem nonchalant but there’s a spark of want in his eyes.

 

Liam rolls them over so he’s on top now, looking down at Zayn with a tiny smile. “Where’s your lube and condoms?” He asks.

 

“Beside table.” Zayn answers and Liam leans over him, grabbing a condom and a bottle of lube before returning to Zayn. He puts a generous amount of lube onto his fingers before going down to Zayn’s hole and rubbing the outside of it, not going in- just teasing him.

 

Zayn shoots him a look, biting on his lip to hold back a moan. “Just hurry up already, fuck.” He moans, trying to move his hips so he’ll get Liam’s finger in him. Liam slowly slips a finger in, pressing passed the ring of muscles and into Zayn’s tight heat, moaning softly at the feeling. If that’s how warm and tight it is on his finger, Liam’s not sure how he’s going to last with that around his dick. He slowly moves his finger in and out, carefully curling it to hit that special spot inside of Zayn as said boy’s head falls back into the pillow with a moan. “There, there.” He whines, hips already moving back against Liam’s finger. He adds another one alongside the first finger, twisting and scissoring the smaller boy open beneath him before adding a third finger. “Liam, babe,” Zayn moans as Liam hits his prostate particularly hard. “Hurry up and _get in me._ ” He growls.

 

Liam slowly removes his fingers from Zayn before grabbing the condom that he put on the bedside table. He opens it and slips it on his dick, lining up with Zayn’s hole. “You want this?” Liam asks breathlessly, needing to make sure that Zayn was a 100% on board with what was happening.

 

“ _Yes._ ” Zayn says, nodding vigorously. “If you don’t get in me now I swear to god, I’m going to go to that bathroom and finish myself off-”

 

Liam lets a small growl escape before slowly pushing into Zayn’s tight heat, growl turning into a moan as he does so. It takes him a couple moments to bottom out and he stops when he is, letting Zayn adjust to his length. “You good?” He asks breathlessly, wanting nothing more than to just fuck into the warmth.

 

Zayn shifts slightly before nodding. “Yeah, yeah move- slow though babe.”

 

Liam starts out slow, like Zayn asked for, slowly dragging his hips farther away from Zayn before pushing back in, setting an agonisingly slow pace. After a few moments, Zayn’s moving back to meet his thrusts, tiny moans coming out of his mouth. “Faster?” Liam asks, already picking up speed just slightly.

 

Zayn nods quickly, eyes fluttering shut as Liam slowly picks up speed, thrusting into Zayn harder and faster, moans coming out of both of their mouths at a higher than normal pitch. Liam moves slightly, changing his angle and successfully hitting Zayn’s prostate spot on, causing him to moan out Liam’s name loudly. “Fuck, keep- right there, yeah.” Zayn whines, breath coming out in high pitch pants. Liam reaches in between their bodies, grabbing Zayn’s dick and jerking him off as best as he can with the awkward angle. It seems to work for Zayn though, because moments later he’s shooting his load in between the two of them with a loud shout. Liam groans at the tightening around his dick, picking up his pace before he finally comes into the condom and collapse on top of Zayn.

 

The two catch their breath before Liam rolls off of Zayn, grimacing at the mess they made. He takes off the condom, ties it off and throws it in the garbage can that’s nearby. They lie there for a couple more moments before Zayn gets up, heading into the washroom to grab a wet cloth. He comes back and wipes Liam down while he grins lazily at him. Zayn rolls his eyes- dare Liam say it- fondly at Liam before heading back into the bathroom. “M’gonna jump in the shower.” He calls back, the shower already starting up.

 

Liam grins. “I’ll join you in a minute.” He laughs.

 

Zayn laughs as well. “I bet you couldn’t even get it up.” He teases.

 

Liam laughs softly to himself, basking in the nice feeling of their banter. He gets up after a couple moments, intending to head over to the bathroom to join Zayn when a sketch book on his dresser catches Liam’s eye. He can’t help his curiosity when he opens it, flipping through the first couple of pages to look at the drawings. They’re good, extremely good, Liam notices right away. The first few are drawings of a couple different girls that look a bit like Zayn (Liam thinks they’re his sisters) but the latest drawing Zayn finished is of… Him. Liam doesn’t see it right away, never envisioned himself looking like how Zayn drew him but he’s… He’s beautiful and strong and purely a shadowhunter. Zayn drew him in his gear, axe in hand and even in the drawing, he seemed to capture a look of determination in Liam’s eyes. His jaw drops slightly as he picks up the book, getting a closer look at the drawing when something else catches his eye.

 

A letter. Addressed to his parents.

 

There’s a cold, sinking feeling in the bottom of Liam’s stomach as he puts the sketchbook down and off to the side, trading it for the letter. He opens it with delicate fingers, eyes filtering over the words and the cold, sinking feeling only gets worse before it turns into a fiery rage.

 

Zayn was sending his parents information of the shadowhunter’s battle strategies.

 

“You didn’t join me in the shower.” Zayn says with a pout in his voice as he comes out of the bathroom. Liam turns to face him, the letter still in his hand. “Liam, I can explain.” Zayn says quickly, eyes widening as they get a look at what’s in his hands.

 

“Explain?” Liam says in a low voice, hands shaking slightly. “You can _explain?_ Tell me Zayn, explain why there is a letter address to your _abusive_ parents.” He pauses. “Or was that all a lie?” He bites his lip roughly. “Was this-” He motions to the room, the space in between the two of them. “Was this all a lie?” Liam tries to make his voice sound strong, but it comes out small and hurt.

 

“No, Liam, please!” Zayn begs, walking forward. Liam puts up a hand to stop him.

 

“My parents went on a secret mission Zayn.” Liam says, tears clouding his vision. “Somehow, the information got leaked. I guess you really did kill them.” He lets a couple tears slip down his face as he shakes his head. Liam lets the letter drop to the floor before walking out, ignoring Zayn’s protests for him to stay, for him to let Zayn explain everything to him.

 

Liam doesn’t care anymore, not when the man he thought he could love killed his parents.

 

_______________________________________

 

A lot happens in the next few days, but Liam’s numb to it all. He tells the councilwoman who’s there what Zayn has been doing and immediately, there’s a need for more councilmen to show up, a trial in the making at their institute. Zayn gets sent back down to live in the dungeons too, not that Liam goes to visit him. He stays in his room all day long, sneaking out only when food is absolutely necessary. He avoids the other boys like the plague to, ignoring them when they try and come into the room. He doesn’t want to be reminding of anything slightly related to Zayn so during his days he just sits on his bed and stares at his wall, mentally torturing himself over and over again.

 

He just couldn’t believe he fell for it all, Zayn’s act. There was no way Zayn meant any of it, not with all the lies he told Liam and all the secrets he kept. He’s still in his sweats (he put them on the day he found out Zayn’s secret- it’s four days after that) when Harry comes forcibly into his rooms.

 

“The door’s locked for a reason.” Liam says in a flat voice, eyes not leaving the wall.

 

“Yeah well, fuck that reason.” It’s the first time Liam’s ever heard Harry swear and it’s enough shock to make him look away from the wall and look at the boy in question. “You’re a piece of shit you know that Liam Payne?” Harry hisses.

 

Liam snorts, looking back to his wall again. “I’m the shit. Funny. It’s not like I’m the sole reason someone’s parents are dead. Multiple parents, actually. Some sons and daughters too.”

 

“He’s the reason so many more are _alive._ ” Harry all but shouts, coming around to the side of the bed where Liam is looking. “Do you know what he was actually doing?” Harry doesn’t let him reply, just continues on. “Of course you don’t, you didn’t let him explain! It was fake information!”

 

Something inside of Liam stops (he thinks it might be his heart) when Harry says those last four words. “What?” He asks in a whisper, eyes going wide. “No, he…”

 

“Some of it was real information, yes.” Harry says slowly, temper under control. “We had to know his parents would still trust him, would be willing to follow later advice. The council, they’re not smart when it comes to battle plans. That was Yasar Malik’s speciality there, and since he’s conducting the war, well, we were going to lose unless someone did something about it.” Harry sits down next to Liam on the bed, sighing. “Then Zayn arrived. Niall and Louis refused to have anything to do with him, they were sort of like you in that sense.” Harry shows him a small smile. “I was the only one willing enough to go down and bring him food. I would usually stay down there for a bit to, just talking to him. Well, talking at seems a little more appropriate. Zayn didn’t say a word till a month after we had captured him and that point, he knew almost everything about me. I can still remember what his first words to me were. ‘Why are you trusting me enough to tell me all this?’” Harry repeats the words, nodding slightly. “And I told him that if no one trusted him, how was he supposed to trust us? He opened up slowly after that- very slowly, I’ll admit it was a bit frustrating at first. But then I found out what it was like back with his parents and I couldn’t blame him for being skittish and suspicious of every act of kindness. I can’t imagine he’s been faced with much of it.”

 

“He’s told me about what happened.” Liam admits in a small voice, getting a surprised look from Harry. “The night we spent in the dungeons together, we talked. It was… It was nice.” He says, voice barely even a whisper.

 

Harry nods. “We advised a plan after your parents’ mission went wrong-”

 

“Wait- you guys didn’t tell his parents about my parents’ mission?” Liam asks, a horrible feeling settling in his gut. He _blamed_ Zayn for that, for so many deaths, oh god-

 

“No, we started it after that.” Harry says slowly. “What did you say to him Liam?”

 

“Oh my god…” Liam says, eyes widening. “Oh my god.”

 

“Liam, what did you say?” Harry presses before his own eyes go wide with shock. “Please tell me you didn’t say you blamed him. Liam, _please._ ”

 

“I told him it was his fault.” Liam says, hand going to his mouth. “I told him he killed my parents.”

 

“Liam no.” Harry whispers, face white.

 

Liam nods. “Oh god, I…” Liam swallows the bile that threatens to make its way up his throat. “Where’s Zayn?” He says, stumbling over himself to get out of the bed to go apologise, beg, listen, _anything_ to get Zayn’s forgiveness for being such an asshole. He should’ve stayed, he should’ve listened, let Zayn explain, anything other than leaving the way he did.

 

“He’s just about to go into a trial Liam.” Harry says in a soft voice, “We’re not allowed in.”

 

“I will be.” Liam says firmly. “I accused him, by law I’m _supposed_ to be there.” He knows the laws of the shadowhunters better than anyone else he’s ever met, he knows he’s right.

 

“You can’t go in looking like that.” Harry points out, wrinkling his nose slightly at the odd smell Liam’s giving off. “Go take a shower and I’ll get some clothes for you and we can head down to where they’re heading the trial. Quick though.”

 

Liam nods, quickly getting out of his bed and running into his bathroom. He shucks off his clothes and showers at record speed before towelling off roughly and heading back into his bedroom where Harry is pulling out an outfit for Liam to tug on hastily before they’re leaving, heading for the trial room in less than 20 minutes.

 

They come to a stop just outside the room which the trial is taking place, Liam’s nerves suddenly acting up. “What if he doesn’t want me there?” Liam asks in a small whisper. “I mean, why would he? I blamed him for over 150 deaths.”

 

Harry puts his hands on Liam’s shoulders, looking at him with a hard look. “You put him in that spot right now, it doesn’t matter whether or not he wants to see you or even if you want to see him. You’re going to go in there, explain it was fake information and it’s the entire reason that we’re not losing this war anymore and you’re going to get Zayn out of there. Do you understand?”

 

Liam swallows the nerves, nodding. Harry was right. “Yeah, I got this.” He says, nodding to himself as Harry pats him on the shoulder.

 

“You can do this.” Harry says as Liam reaches for the door handle, opening the door and stepping into the room.

 

The room that they’re holding the trial in isn’t a big room- not that they would need one. The jury consists of 7 people and the only other people in the room are the court reporter, the judge and Zayn, who’s sitting in the middle of the room like a pig waiting to be slaughtered. Liam doesn’t look at him for long (he can’t, not with all the guilt eating at him), but the glance he does spare at him tells Liam all he needs to know. Zayn looks like he’s barely slept a wink since Liam found out and ate even less than he slept. “Mr. Payne.” One of the jurywoman say when he walks in, causing everyone else in the room to look at him. Everyone but Zayn, who’s only body movement is to stiffen ever so slightly. “We weren’t expecting you.”

 

“I, um.” Liam says, licking his lips nervously. “I wasn’t going to come.” He admits. “But I found out something today, about what I’ve told you.”

 

The judge looks curious and motions for him to come forward and talk. “Why don’t you tell the jury what you found out Mr. Payne.”

 

Liam nods, licking his lips again before biting roughly on the bottom one as he makes his way to stand in front of the judge and jury. His heart is beating wildly in his chest, the words Harry said to him ringing in his mind more and more loudly with each step he takes towards the judge. “I never read the letter- I mean, not fully.” Liam admits. “I read the beginning, where Zayn was talking about past information he gave them and- and I wasn’t in the right mind to fully understand what I was reading, how it was incorrect. There were thin lies with every word Zayn wrote, telling just enough truth to keep his parents from questioning his loyalties but enough lies to turn the tables in our favour.”

 

“There were spies already in the Malik force.” One of the jury ladies say with an eye roll. “What could this _boy_ do that trained professionals couldn’t?”

 

“Get their trust.” Liam says firmly, eyes moving from the judge to this new lady. She’s heavyset, which is a little on the odd side for shadowhunters. Something told Liam she never had to fight a day in her life. “Malik isn’t an idiot- he was your battle strategist for a reason. He wouldn’t trust anyone who wasn’t already on his side before the war. Zayn had his trust- or enough of it to get information out of his father.”

 

“But why would he risk himself like that for people who shoved him in a cage for months?” A different jury member asked. A man this time, but he looked kinder than the woman.

 

“Cage for a few months versus a box for a number of years.” Zayn says, voice rough from lack of use. “Dunno about you guys, but the cage is more spacious and a little kinder.”

 

Liam can’t help it, he looks over his shoulder, eyes locking with Zayn’s. There’s a message sent between them, a soft flash of something in Zayn’s eyes that Liam knows isn’t forgiveness but it’s something else, something close to forgiveness. Like a chance at it. He looks back at the jury members, a few of them have wide eyes at what Zayn is implying but most look cold- unaffected. It makes Liam’s blood boil. Zayn goes on as if he couldn’t care less, voice and tone nonchalant but Liam sees the small tremor in his hand, the hard and determined look in his eyes. “I was 6 the first time my mother hit me. My father shoved me into a small chest when I started to cry.” His voice isn’t the same as it had been when he told Liam, it wasn’t cold or distance. This voice was serving a purpose. It was determined. “It went downhill after that. I may hate the council and everything you stand for, but I hate my parents more.” His voice is ice sharp, cutting through the silence with a purpose. Freedom. “After all, the enemy of my enemy is my friend.”

 

The jury leaves the room to deliberate, leaving Zayn and Liam alone in the trial room. There’s an awkward silence between them and Liam doesn’t know what to say. There’s so many things he wants to say all at once and not at all that he’s just so unsure about how to react. “Harry explained to me.” Liam finally says, the silence reaching an unbearable height.

 

“I figured.” Zayn says in a light voice but Liam likes to think he knows the other boy well enough now that this is really bothering him, and Liam doesn’t blame him.

 

“I was wrong to blame you.” He says, taking a shuddery breath. “I shouldn’t have said any of those things, I should’ve let you explain, I should’ve-”

 

“Yeah, you should’ve.” Zayn says, cutting him off with both a look and a few words. “A lot of shit happens when you jump to conclusions Payne.”

 

It stings, Liam will admit that, that Zayn’s calling him by his last name again. “Zayn…” He says in a soft voice, trying to get Zayn to look at him at the very least.

 

Zayn’s head whips around to face him, eyes glossy. “What Liam?” He hisses, voice cracking with emotion. “What do you want me to say? I _trusted_ you and- and then you went and blamed 153 shadowhunter’s deaths on me- including the people you held most dear. Do you know how much that broke me? How badly I needed to explain?” A few tears fall down his face and Liam feels his own tears wielding up in his eyes.

 

“Zayn I’m-” Liam starts to say but suddenly ‘sorry’ doesn’t seem like a big enough word to cover his guilt, to beg for forgiveness. “I shouldn’t have blamed you.” Is what he repeats, a tear slipping out. “I don’t, not anymore. You saved so many others-”

 

“And here I am, on trial against people who don’t trust a word that come out of my mouth.” Zayn shakes his head. “I just… I trusted you Liam, I really did.”

 

“Zayn please.” Liam says, reaching for him. Zayn jerks backwards, causing a lump to grow in Liam’s throat as he lets his arm drop back to his side. “Please let me explain.”

 

“Why?” He whispers, “Why should I let you explain when you didn’t let me?”

 

 _Because I think I might fall in love with you_ nearly slips out of Liam’s mouth but he bites his tongue just in time. “Because I don’t want to be stuck like this with you.” Liam says softly, “I don’t want the person who’s made me feel everything, something, since my parents death to be upset, I don’t want you to ever be in this type of position again. I want to protect you, make you happy, smile.” _I want a chance love you_ goes unsaid for Liam but he’s sure his eyes say it all as they look desperately at Zayn.

 

“Why?” Zayn asks in a small voice, as if scared to voice the question or maybe even scared of the answer.

 

“Because you’re worth it.” Liam says in a soft voice, hand reaching up to cup the side of his face softly. Zayn relaxes into the hold almost automatically, setting off a flutter of butterflies in Liam’s stomach. “I was so confused.” He admits in a small voice. “I was so happy that we were together, we were something and then…” He takes a deep breath, taking a couple steps back in his story. “I saw your drawings, of your sisters and of… And of me.” He says honestly. “They were so lovely Zayn, amazing really. You have such a talent for it but then… I saw the letter, saw what you were talking about and who it was addressed to and. And all I could think about was my parents. God, I hadn’t even had time to mourn for them, they were always being pushed to the back of my mind because I was training or I was nearly dying or I was doing something else and I realise how unhealthy that is now but at the moment, I just… I couldn’t even bring myself to face the fact that I was all but alone in this world. My only living family member was somewhere deep undercover, risking her life without even knowing that she didn’t have a mother or father to come home to. I was so alone Zayn.” His voice cracks on the last sentence, unable to help the wave of emotions coming over him. “And then, I just… I needed to blame someone and you were there and I know, I know now how wrong I was and I don’t think you understand how I’m going to forever feel guilty over it because I was so wrong, none of it was ever your fault. You were a victim as much as the rest of us in this war. Maybe even more.”

 

“I…” Zayn says, a couple tears falling. Liam wipes them away softly with one of his thumbs. “Liam, I-”

 

“Sorry to interrupt boys.” The judge says coming back in. Liam and Zayn quickly separate, both discreetly trying to wipe the tears off their faces. “The jury has come to a decision about Zayn’s fate.” Both boys perk up, hearts beating wildly and hopes high. “Zayn, you can get off free and even be released from imprisonment on one condition.”

 

“Anything.” Zayn says, showing the first sign of emotion in front of someone other than Liam.

 

“Help us catch your parents.”

 

_______________________________________

 

The next couple of weeks are spent in a flurry, Zayn and Liam barely have time to breathe much less talk about what happened in the trial. The institute is constantly filled with the buzzed of what was going to happen.

 

It was a simple enough plan, really, but it still had Liam worried to bits. Zayn was going to be playing their bait, the hostage being moved. He wrote his parents another letter, telling them how they were moving to Idris because the war was turning and they wanted to keep their prisoner on a closer leash, so if his parents cared for him at all, they would come try to rescue Zayn. The letter in reply came a day later, saying they would of course save their darling son from the evil claws of the council.

 

Soon enough (or maybe too soon for Liam’s liking), everyone is set in place around where the confrontation was due to go down. Liam’s standing back in the shadows with Niall and some other warriors, everyone standing at the ready with their weapons. Most of them have swords, leaving Liam and Niall to be the odd men out with the axe and whip, respectively. Harry and the other archers where on building tops, arrows already in place and waiting for the proper moment to strike while Louis was in the transport van with Zayn since he was the second best warrior at the institute and they needed another person by Zayn’s side who could pass as a prisoner.

 

“I’m worried.” Liam admits quietly to Niall as they wait. “There’s so many things that could go wrong with this plan.”

 

Niall shakes his head. “Zayn won’t go back with them alive, you know that Li.”

 

“That’s what I’m worried about.” Liam mutters and Niall refrains from replying when something catches his expert eye. He nudges Liam, nodding to where he saw it. At first, Liam doesn’t see anything but after a couple moments of watching it like Zayn taught him, he sees what Niall saw. The tiniest of movements in the darkness, something that could be a rat or a person. A gut feeling tells Liam it’s not a rat.

 

He’s proven right a couple moments later when the guards around Zayn and Louis’s truck drop (Liam hopes they aren’t dead but this past few weeks at the institute have forced him to stop being so naive in the sense of war) like dead weights and two people are coming out of the shadows, a man and a woman.

 

No one moves as they go to the van, all waiting for Louis’s signal to move in and attack. Zayn’s only request for this mission was to be able to talk to his parents before they were captured (killed seemed more appropriate but Liam knew that losing your parents, no matter how shitty they were, sucked). They break open the van easily enough and pull Zayn out, who goes willingly enough.

 

“You can leave him.” Zayn says in a rough voice, obviously referring to Louis. “Some low level criminal.”

 

The man raises an eyebrow at Zayn. “Now now, perhaps if the young man is willing to join our cause, he could be some use to us, what do you think Tricia?”

 

Louis says something that Liam can’t hear but it causes an annoyed look to filter across the woman’s (Tricia’s) face. “Leave him.” She says, voice cold and cruel. “Zayn, come now.” She snaps. “We’ve been here too long already.” She grabs Zayn’s wrist in a tight grip that causes Zayn’s body to tense ever so slightly that Liam almost misses it but his mother doesn’t. Her eyes squint slightly, darting around before she pulls Zayn suddenly towards her, flipping him so his back is to her front and she has a knife to his throat. “Never thought you would be the one to betray us.” She says to him before calling out to the open air. “Why don’t you come out and play, shadowhunters?” She cackles, eyes going wild.

 

Liam looks over at Niall, heart hammering in his chest. There was nothing more that he wanted to do than go over there and chop her head off (a little morbid, he knows) but he couldn’t put the mission at risk. Niall shakes his head ever so slightly at Liam, silently telling him to wait for Louis’s command. As difficult as it is, Liam stays where he is, grip tight on his axe, waiting for the signal.

 

It wasn’t an easy signal, especially not how Zayn was in danger. Louis was supposed to signal the archers first, so they could let down a sea of arrows attached to a large net, hoping to trap the Maliks (Zayn excluded) under it and then the foot soldiers would come in and secure it. It may seem simple in theory but when you added masterminds who refused to be within ten feet of one another _and_ a (Zayn wouldn’t want to be called a civilian so Liam isn’t sure what to call him) in danger, things got complicated.

 

“Mother please.” Zayn says, voice strong but Liam sees the flashes of panic crossing his eyes every couple of seconds, the twitch in his hands to go for his weapons, to do _something._ “Why are you doing this? I’m your _son._ ” His voice cracks on the last word, as if he wants it to mean something to her.

 

“Sweetie, you planned this.” She says, pressing the dagger tighter to his neck drawing a small drop of blood. “Yasar, check the perimeter. _Now.”_

 

That was all Louis needed to send the signal, the net launching onto Yasar and a smaller group of men springing into action to keep him pinned down. Louis jumps out of van as soon as everything springs into action, quickly off balancing and surprising Tricia long enough for Zayn to twist out of her hold and for him and Louis to get side by side, Zayn holding a dagger in each hand and Louis wielding a long sword, all three weapons pointed at her. Liam’s group moves in quickly now too, Liam going immediately to flank Zayn’s other side, Niall going to Louis’s and the rest of the men going around her in a full circle. Liam can see in the corner of his eye the archers moving closer in, half the arrows on Tricia and the other half on Yasar- who’s still tied down in the net.

 

“I suggest you surrender.” Louis says firmly, eyes never leaving his target.

 

She laughs heartlessly. “Well, where’s the fun in that? I mean, I’m dying either way… Why not bring some of you with me?”

 

Everything happens in a quick moment, it can’t be longer than 30 seconds but everything changes.

 

Tricia lunges, straight for Zayn and only gut instincts have Liam moving, shoving Zayn behind him as he gets in the way of her weapon (a small dagger that no one had seen). It digs into his chest, Liam’s sure it’s hit his heart and as she removes it, blood rushes down his chest, soaking his shirt and Liam stumbles, vision already stopping black. He falls to the ground, almost in slow motion as he think he hears a scream- maybe a war cry, Liam’s not sure everything is so… So fuzzy and warm and-

 

“Liam?” Someone’s chocking and it has Liam’s heart fluttering (even with the whole he’s sure it’s sporting) and he forces his eyes to open, just a bit to see Zayn’s face.

 

“Zayn.” He tries to say but it comes out all gargled, blood filling his mouth.

 

There’s a new wetness on his face, Liam thinks it might be tears and Zayn starts to say something, but the darkness is grabbing Liam and forcibly and unmercifully pulling him under.

 

_______________________________________

 

Liam’s not sure how it happens but it feels like a couple groggy seconds later, he’s waking up in a stereotypical bright white room.

 

“I really hope heaven isn’t always this bright.” He mumbles to himself, shutting his eyes again.

 

Someone lets out a distressed laugh, half way between a cackle and a cry. “I wouldn’t be here if this was heaven.” The voice says, cracking over a couple different words as if it had been days since they spoke.

 

Liam forces himself to open his eyes again, blinking multiple times to get them to adjust to the brightness of the room. It’s not heaven, he belatedly realises, instead a hospital-like room. “Where am I?” He asks, needing to shut his eyes again. The room was still too bright for him.

 

“Back at the institute babe.” They say, voice soft and comforting and something clicks in Liam that has his eyes shooting open again.

 

“Zayn!” He says, looking at the boy. “Your- I was there and then-” Liam can’t fully put together what had happened before he passed out. “Is everyone ok?”

 

“Depends on your definition of everyone.” He says after a moment, hand still on Liam’s arm. He looks down at said hand as he talks. “The guards are dead. My father is going to be executed after he gives up the location of my sisters.” Zayn pauses. “I killed my mother.”

 

“Zayn…” Liam says, voice soft and a bit shocked. He knew Zayn had it in him to kill, he’d seen him kill a demon, knew he’d killed other shadowhunters before the captured him, but this was different. “How… How are-”

 

“I should feel something.” Zayn interrupts him. “I feel something for every single innocent person I killed, that my parents killed but…” He shrugs, looking up at Liam, their eyes locking. “I don’t feel anything for her. Is that wrong?”

 

Liam shakes his head. “Zayn, no.” He says, hand reaching up to cup his face. “She did nothing but harm you, you’re safe now. You did what you had to do.” He says earnestly as Zayn relaxes his head into Liam’s warm hand.

 

“Thank you.” He mumbles into Liam’s hand, eyes shutting for a moment.

 

“What for?”

 

Zayn opens his eyes again, locking with Liam’s for the second time this conversation. Liam can’t help but notice how big the bags are under them, how pale the skin looks. He wonders, belatedly, how long he’d been asleep and how long Zayn had spent at his side. “You were there for me.” Zayn whispers. “Maybe not at first, but we were- we were both so cold and cut off, not just from each other but to everyone else too.”

 

“Especially to each other though.” Liam quirks a small smile, unable to help it. They were rather rude to each other in the beginning. He can’t believe how far they’d come, from hate to almost love in such a short time. He feels like he should be surprised with how quickly he’d fallen for Zayn but in a life of extremes like a shadowhunter’s life, everything was in extreme. Death, hate, love. Everything.

 

Zayn laughs softly, nodding. “Yeah I guess we were.” They’re quiet for a moment before the next words burst out of Zayn’s mouth, almost like it was against his will. “You nearly died Liam.”

 

“What?” Liam says but, of course, that should be obvious to him.

 

Zayn nods. “If the dagger hit even a centimeter more to the left than it did, you would have died Liam.” He pauses. “I don’t know what I would’ve done if you died.” His voice is so small, tiny and it reminds Liam of a young boy and for once, he’s seeing Zayn as he should be. A young boy, barely even a man, who’s seen too much in too short of a time. Someone who just needed to be held and told it was all going to be ok.

 

“I’m here though.” Liam says, voice just as soft as Zayn’s. The moment is intimate, meant for no one other than the two of them and Liam wants to keep it that way. “I’m here Zayn, I’m not going anywhere.”

 

Nothing matters outside of them, not the ending of a war or the worrying over sisters and their lives, nothing matters right now in this small, soft moment of two boys finding love in a dark time of hate and war. Nothing more matters to them than their love.

 

Not right now, anyways.

**Author's Note:**

> so in retrospect, the timeline in this fic is really short so I apologise if it seems rushed I just forget that time is a thing that's actually spaced out and I'm terrible. But yes, I hope everyone enjoyed it!
> 
> [my tumblr](http://squishyliampayne.tumblr.com/) / [artist's tumblr](http://caputell.tumblr.com/)


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